Everyone ready to get to the bottom of Charlie's death...and party some more?

Mike: NO.

Peter: I'm not sure...

Micky: Yeah!

Davy: Ready.

(We open right where we left off, with the guys trying to sweep and vacuum off Charlie. There's a knock at the door as Mike tries to reattach his hairpiece.)

Mike: Would somebody get that?

Micky: I'll get it! *Opens the door.*

Emma: (She, Lauren, Daphne, and Valerie walk in with their bags) Hi, guys. How's the house-sitting coming?

Mike: Shit. (He goes out to join the girls) Not well.

Emma: Mike, what's going on? You look run ragged.

Mike: Our host is dead.

Emma: WHAT?

Micky: *Waves it off* He's only a little dead.

Valerie: How can someone only be a little dead?

Emma: What's going on?

Mike: Your guess is as good as ours. He never picked us up from the Ferry Terminal. When we finally showed up here, we found him with a needle full of poison in his pocket!

Emma: Suicide?

Mike: We don't know. We have no idea WHAT happened!

Valerie: Has anyone called the police yet?

Mike: And what are we supposed to tell them, that we just walked in and found this guy dead?

Micky: You know who they'd blame? *Motions to the guys*

Emma: (She makes it to the living room first...and stops when she sees Peter vacuuming Charlie) Why is Peter vacuuming a dummy?

Micky: That's the dead guy.

Emma: (She jumps back) That's him?

Peter: He got lost on the beach. It's kind of a long story.

Mike: I don't think there's much more we can do tonight. The cops probably ain't even on duty.

Emma: (Shakes her head) We'll try calling the cops and explaining things in the morning. Maybe we should get him someplace cooler, before he smells.

Mike: We could just stick him in one of the rooms upstairs.

Peter: I'm not sleeping next to a dead body.

Valerie: We'll avoid his room.

Micky: We won't make anyone sleep in the same room as him.

Davy: Except maybe Micky.

Micky: Nice.

Mike: (Grins at Micky) You can have the other bed in his room.

Micky: I don't think so!

Emma: Who wants to carry him upstairs?

Mike: (Looks at Davy and Micky) Since you two seem to be so good at it...

Micky: Sure, why not?

Davy: But let’s not make this a habit.

Emma: (She settles down on the couch as the duo take Charlie, now with re-attached hair, upstairs) Ok, Mike. Tell me how this all began.

Mike: I ain't sure. All I know is that we showed up at the house, and Charlie was dead.

Valerie: Does anyone besides the eight of us know this?

Peter: (Shakes his head) That's the odd thing. Not one single person on this entire island has noticed it but us.

Emma: How can that be?

Mike: Em, you should know better than the rest of us. This is a summer resort area on Memorial Day Weekend. All of Charlie's buddies are smoozers, drunks, and beach bums high on too many pina coladas and falls of their surfboards. I doubt any of these people would notice if half the island died.

Peter: (Shudders) Don't say things like that, Michael. One dead body is more than enough.

Mike: First thing in the mornin', soon as we eat, we're gonna explain the whole thing to the cops.

Emma: (Looks up as Micky and Davy come downstairs) What's all this about a party? You guys had a party with a dead body around?

Peter: (Grins) Actually, it was a pretty groovy party!

Micky: It wasn't us! The party was already on and briefly stopped here.

Mike: Seems there's a party that just sorta wanders around every weekend, and this is one of their stops.

Peter: The musicians told me they'll be here tomorrow night, too.

Emma: And no one noticed a dead body in their midst?

Mike: As far as we could tell.

Valerie: (Grins at Micky and Davy) How was the party, anyway?

Micky: Great, actually.

Davy: I rather enjoyed it meself.

Peter: If the cops will let us, I think we really should stay here for the weekend. Other than the body, this is fun.

Mike: I can't believe what you're all sayin'!

Emma: (As Lauren joins her on the couch) I don't think there's much else we can do right now. Maybe if we got a good night's sleep...

(Suddenly, there's another, rather noisy, knock on the door.)

Peter: (As everyone freezes in their tracks) What's that?

Mike: Tell me it's the Avon lady.

Micky: I hope so!

Mike: Who wants to get it?

Female Voice: Let me in, you bastard! You've been cheatin' on me!

Emma: Oh dear.

Micky: Um, I'll get it. I don't think any of the ladies should.

(Micky opens the door to reveal the woman who was at the lunch with the executives, Belavarg, and Charlie earlier. She now wears an expensive and rumpled dress and very high platform heels and carries a bottle of liquor. Her eyes are filled with angry fire.)

Woman: WHERE IS HE?

Micky: Who?

Woman: Charlie! Where is he? (She stumbles around, pushing pillows and plants aside) Where are you, you cheatin' swine?

Micky: He's upstairs, sleeping it off!

Woman: Who in the hell are you guys?

Mike: We're here for the weekend. Who are you?

Woman: I'm his woman!

Peter: His...woman?

Woman: His Teresa! We were supposed 'ta meet for lunch, and the lyin' jackass never showed up! I'll bet he was cheatin' on me!

Emma: (Puts up a hand) We don't know anything about it, Teresa. We just showed up ourselves.

Teresa: He's upstairs?

Peter: Yeah. I doubt he'd go anywhere in his current (Mike elbows him)...um, inebriated state.

Teresa: I'm gonna kill him if he has another chick up there! (She stomps angrily upstairs)

Micky: Spunky, ain't she?

Emma: Other than she's drunk off her ass, I think she's very sensible.

Mike: You would. (He frowns as he plops down next to Emma) Do you think she'll figure it out?

Micky: I think it depends.

Peter: (Looks slightly green) Oh, she wouldn't...

Davy: If she's drunk enough...

Micky: And she probably is.

Valerie: She'd do it.

(Cut to outside. Bertanelli is behind a bush, watching the upstairs window with binoculars. The camera focuses on the room where Charlie is. We see Teresa storm into the room, but she immediately grins when she sees Charlie. We see her start to take off her dress and lay on the bed as the camera cuts back to a shocked Bertanelli.)

Bertanelli: The bastard's alive! I don't know how he did it, but he's alive! (He pulls out a walkie-talkie) Boss, it didn't work! Towland's still livin'!

Belavarg: *Over the walkie talkie* What do you mean, it didn't work!?

Bertanelli: He's screwin' Teresa right now! (Raises an eyebrow as we hear screaming from the room) I didn't think that position was humanly possible.

Belavarg: Dammit! Bertanelli, you try again...and this time, do it RIGHT! *Walkie talkie goes to static*

Bertanelli: Damn it. It's too late tonight. I'll try again tomorrow.

(Cut back to the house. Mike drinks imported beer behind the bar. Everyone else has sodas or iced tea. We hear the sounds of heavy breathing and screaming coming from upstairs.)

Emma: I don't believe this.

Micky: *Slight grin* Holy crap!

Mike: (Burps) They're pretty damn good, for one bein' drunk and the other bein' dead.

Davy: That's bloody true.

(Peter just looks green.)

(Teresa finally stumbles back downstairs, dressed and with a slightly dazed grin on her face. She sits at the bar and reapplies her lipstick.)

Micky: Have fun?

*Lauren elbows Micky.*

Teresa: Best we've done in weeks.

Mike: Sure sounded like it.

Teresa: Anyone got any scotch and soda? ;)

Mike: (Grins) You bet. (Hands her the requested drink; she downs it)

Teresa: Well... (smirks) You guys have a fun night, too. I know how to let myself out. Happy Memorial Day Weekend! (She saunters out)

Peter: She...she didn't even...

Mike: Well, I'll be damned!

Valerie: I can't BELIEVE she didn't notice!

Daphne: Unbelievable.

Mike: She was hot and bothered and drunk out of her mind. She wouldn't have noticed if he were an alien who wanted to take her to his mother ship.

Micky: Damn.

Peter: I'm going to bed. I don't feel well.

Emma: That reminds me, who wants to sleep where?

Mike: I ain't sleepin' upstairs.

Peter: Me either.

Valerie: (Sighs) I'll sleep upstairs. It's creepy, but I'm really can't sleep on the couch.

Peter: Valerie, maybe you'd better stay down here...

Micky: *Motions between himself and Lauren* We'll go up there.

Lauren: *Sighs* Thanks, Mick.

Emma: Why don't Davy and Daphne and Micky and Lauren take upstairs and Mike and I and Valerie and Peter sleep down here? (She pulls a cushion off the couch) It looks like this rolls out into a bed.

Davy: Fine with me. Daph?

Daphne: That's fine.

Mike: Fine.

Valerie: (Sighs) I guess it's all right.

Peter: We'll be together, Val.

Valerie: Yeah.

Mike: (Yawns) Ok troops, everyone get some shut-eye. We've got to get up bright and early to call the cops and turn Charlie over to them.

Peter: (Also yawns) Fine by me. Night, guys.

Emma: (Nods) Night.

Micky: Night, everyone!

Davy: See you in the morning.

Mike: (Mutters) I hope so.

Emma: Baby!

Davy: *As he, Daphne, Micky, and Lauren head for the stairs* Knowing you, Mick, I bet you wanna try to top Teresa and Charlie.

Micky: How tough could it be? Lauren and I are alive!

Lauren: I'm not hearing this conversation.

Daphne: *Shakes her head* Me either.

(Fade out as the quartet walk upstairs. Fade in on the next morning. Mike is still passed out on blankets on the floor. He looks up...and we look through his bleary eyes as we see Emma flipping pancakes in the small kitchen. Lauren sits at the bar, sipping orange juice.)

Mike: (Groans) Maaannn...

Emma: Good morning, Sleeping Beauty.

Mike: What time is it?

Lauren: Almost 11.

Mike: (Eyes widen) What?! Why did you let me sleep that late?

Emma: You needed it. You guys had a long night last night. Val and Daphne went to the nearest convenience store to pick up supplies. Peter's still in bed, as far as we know.

Mike: Where's Davy and Micky?

Emma: Outside. I'm not sure what they're doing, other than it's noisy.

Mike: Great. (He pulls on some pants and stumbles outside. Cut to outside. Micky, Davy, and Charlie are sitting at a table by the pool, "playing" Monopoly and "waving" to passers-by.)

Girl: Hey, Charlie! Hey, guys! Great party last night! Can't wait for the one tonight!

*Micky grins as he makes Charlie nod.*

Girl: You guys gonna be there again?

Micky: Of course!

Davy: We wouldn't miss it!

Girl: Great! (Blows them a kiss and heads off)

Mike: (Stumbles out; shades his eyes from the sun) Damn it... (To the guys) What are you DOING?

Micky: Playing Monopoly.

Mike: With a dead guy?

Davy: Yeah.

Mike: Don't tell me he's winnin'.

Micky: We won't tell you.

Mike: Look, I think we should go to the cops. I don't care how much you two want to party. We can't keep doin' this all weekend.

(Mike stumbles out to the trio by the pool.)

Mike: How are you makin' him nod and wave, anyway?

Micky: Fishing line.

Mike: You think he'll be ok outside? Em's makin' breakfast, an' we gotta talk.

Micky: He's been okay so far.

Emma: (She pokes her head out) I have pancakes, orange juice, and coffee ready for you guys if you're hungry.

Davy: Let’s go, mates. I'm starving!

Micky: Don't have to ask me twice. *Gets up with Charlie in tow. He’s obviously used to it by now.*

Mike: (Follows the other two inside, where Peter now joins Lauren at the bar) Hi, Pete. How was your sleep?

Peter: Not great. (Raises an eyebrow as Micky and Davy "walk" Charlie in) How are you doing that?

Micky: It's a secret.

Peter: (As the guys settle Charlie on the smaller couch in the sunken pit in the living room) What have you been doing all morning?

Mike: Sleepin'. Wish I still was. I could pass this all off as a nightmare.

Emma: Actually, I was up around 8 and spent the morning watching cartoons and reading. (She brings Micky his pancakes) How about you two?

Micky: We've been out on the beach all morning.

Mike: (As Emma brings him pancakes) As soon as the other two come back, we're going to the cops.

Emma: I think that would be wise. (Looks at Lauren and nods) The girls and I did some research on this Towland man after all of you left yesterday. That's why we came later.

Mike: Good. I want to know what's goin' on myself. This just seems too out of the blue to me.

Emma: I think I have at least some idea of who suggested you house-sit. (Pause, then) Charles Towland is a senior vice-president of Dark Star Records.

Mike: (Eyes widen) What?

Peter: Oh no.

Micky: No way...

Lauren: And Towland had been fired from Columbia because he was caught skimming funds off their books.

Mike: No wonder he can afford this place and the parties an' shit.

Emma: That's not the only thing he was caught doing at Columbia. Apparently, he was sleeping 'round with several of the top executives' wives, too, and quite a few starlets.

Mike: Don't tell Teresa that.

Micky: It isn't like she can kill him or anything.

Peter: No wonder he killed himself. Maybe he couldn't live with the guilt anymore.

Mike: Or maybe some jealous executive offed him.

Peter: I wish there was a way we could find out!

Mike: Pete, it ain't like he'd leave detailed notes about everythin' he ever scammed.

Micky: No, but there might be something around here.

Mike: Why would he do that?

Micky: Why wouldn't he?

Peter: Actually, it makes sense. This is supposed to be his private beach house. He might keep notes of his earnings in the office or upstairs in his bedroom.

Emma: Why don't Lauren, Micky, and I search while the rest of you finish your pancakes? If we find something, we'll call you. Lauren and I ate ages ago, and the human vacuum cleaner just finished.

Micky: That be me.

Mike: Fine by me. Anythin' that'll clear us with the cops.

(Emma, Micky, and Lauren walk over to the office area where Charlie was found with the needle in his pocket the day before.)

Emma: Micky, search the top of the desk. Lauren, you check the drawers. I'll go through his briefcase and filing cabinet.

(Emma grabs the briefcase, yanks it open, and thumbs through the contents.)

Emma: Nothing here but contracts for Dark Star musicians. How 'bout you guys?

*Micky roots around on the top of the desk.*

Lauren: *Frowns* Nothing but stationary items in the drawers.

*Micky leans over a tape recorder and presses the "Play" button. A voice comes on...*

Emma: (Looks up; frowns) The voice talking to Charlie is familiar. It sounds like...like...

Micky: *growls* Belavarg.

Mike: (He joins them, growling) I hear a familiar voice I wish I didn't.

Emma: He set this whole thing up just to get his hands on us!

Mike: That can't be all there is to it. Why get all this together to grab us...but kill Charlie?

Emma: (She's riffling through the files) Maybe Bela didn't like sharing his girlfriends. Charlie sounds like a real rover.

Peter: (He heads out next, still eating pancakes) What's this about Belavarg?

Mike: No wonder my wolf senses have been on triple-time ever since we arrived. He set this whole thing up with Charlie to try to get his hands on us.

Peter: But why kill Charlie if he wants us?

Emma: (Raises her eyebrows as she pulls out several files filled with stacks of papers with numbers) This might have something to do with it. It's the company's balance sheets. (She hands them to Lauren) You're the banker. See anything wrong here?

Lauren: *Scans over barely half a page* Yeah, I do. Nothing balances, blatantly so.

Mike: He's skimmin' from Dark Star, too.

Emma: In more way than one, I'll bet. Teresa must be something else he's "skimming."

Peter: Belavarg had him killed because he stole Teresa?

Mike: He probably decided he was too much of a liability, between the money and his women.

Micky: Ol' Charlie didn't know who he was dealing with.

Peter: Literally. I doubt he knew his boss is a demon.

Mike: (As Davy joins them) That settles it. We're callin' the girls and tellin' them to meet us and Charlie at the police station.

Emma: (As we hear a knock at the door) NOW who's here?

Peter: What if it's someone to kill us, too?

Mike: Probably more of Belavarg's boys come back for us.

Emma: We'd better be careful.

Mike: Yeah. Davy can get it.

Davy: Thanks, mate. *Heads for the door*

Mike: (Turns to the others) While Davy stalls the guys at the door, we're gonna get out of here. Micky and Peter, you get Charlie. Em, you grab those folders. Lauren, see if you can open the garage door without anyone noticin'. We'll take Ursula to the station. Lauren's car is too small to fit all of us.

(Cut to the front door. Three men in olive jumpsuits and carrying tools and gardening supplies stand outside.)

Handyman #1: Ok, where's Mr. Towland?

Handyman #2: He owes us fifty bucks for fixing the pipes in his bathroom and another hundred for his kitchen!

Gardener: He still owes me money from last summer!

Davy: He isn't here right now!

Handyman #2: Can you tell us when he'll be back?

Davy: *Shakes his head* I'm sorry, I don't know.

Handyman #1: (Sees Micky and Peter dragging Charlie across the living room in the background) Hey, isn't that him?

Davy: *Turns* Uhhmm...

Handyman #2: Yeah! Mr. Towland! (Waves an arm above Davy's head...but when Davy turns around, all he sees is Emma carrying the briefcase and Mike waving)

Davy: Where? I don't see him.

Handyman #2: Look, kid, we've gotta talk to him.

Handyman #1: Or else!

Davy: I told you, he ain't here!

(Mike taps Davy on the shoulder and nods at the way they went with Charlie.)

Handyman #1: Maybe you'd better deliver a message from us to Mr. Towland. Tell him we want our money. Now.

Davy: *Nods* I can do that.

Gardener: Tell him to call me as soon as he gets in, ok?

Davy: Right, you got it.

(The men leave the door as Davy heads out to the garage. Cut to Ursula pulling out of the garage. Charlie sits in the back of the car. Mike and Emma are in the front seat. Peter, Lauren, and Micky are in the middle seat. Davy sits with Charlie in the back.)

Ursula: You have a dead man sitting on my upholstery?

Mike: Urse, it ain't like he's gonna bleed or anythin'!

Micky: And he doesn't have cooties, either.

Ursula: It does explain why he didn't meet you at the Ferry Terminal.

Mike: Stood up his girlfriend, too. She showed up last night madder than a March Hare and about as coherent.

Ursula: I think I heard her. She was spouting curses that would make sailors blush and doing it loud enough for the entire island and a great deal of the southern California mainland to hear.

Mike: Yeah, that was her.

Ursula: She didn't hurt any of you, did she? She sounded drunk and angry enough to do so.

Mike: Nahh. Matter of fact, she and Charlie had a great time last night.

Ursula: (Pause; then) You didn't just say that.

Micky: Nope, he did.

Davy: Uh, mates? We've got company.

Mike: (Looks in his rearview window; sees a van and a discreet dark-blue Sedan) Great. Maybe we can outrun them.

("99 Pounds" begins as Mike steps on the gas. The other two vehicles do as well.)

(Mike tries to dodge the van. It pulls up next to them, the occupants motioning something to effect that "We want our money!")

*Micky holds up a sign that says "We got no $."*

(Davy finds himself ducking bullets coming out of seemingly nowhere, flying right into Charlie's back! Cut to Bertanelli leaning out of the dark blue sedan, grinning in satisfaction.)

Peter: (Over the music) I think someone's shooting at us!

Mike: Swell. Mick, you installed any new tricks in Urse lately?

Micky: Yup! *Presses a button; a shield pops up at the back of the card, protecting it from bullets*

(Mike pushes another button. A mechanical hand pops out of the back of the trunk with a large bottle of suntan lotion. It rubs lotion on the window of the van. The van goes careening into the beach, where it finally runs into a shower and changing building. People run out of the building screaming. The men lean out of the van's windows, dazed.)

Mike: (As they pull back on the main road and the music ends) That takes care of those guys.

Peter: (Looks behind them) The sedan's gone, too.

Micky: Good.

Mike: Well, this settles it. Someone's out to kill Charlie...and us!

Peter: Maybe it would be better if we got Charlie - and us - out of sight for a while, or at least until the cops arrive.

Mike: Yeah, that's not a bad idea.

Peter: (Points to a small convenience store up ahead) There's Val and Daphne!

(Valerie and Daphne carry bags of groceries. They're about to go to Rosemarie, Valerie's car, when Mike pulls up next to them.)

Valerie: Hi, guys. What's going on?

Mike: (As Micky and Davy take the groceries) We need you ladies to do us a favor.

Valerie: What? What's going on? Why is there bullet holes in the back fender?

Mike: It's a long story, darlin', but it amounts to someone tryin' to kill us.

Peter: Valerie, we'll explain it to you at the harbor. We can't go back to the house. Someone might be watching it.

Valerie: Well, all right, but...

Mike: Trust us, darlin'.