Ready for your vacation?

Mike: Honestly, I ain't sure.

Peter: Yes.

Micky: I am!

Davy: Me, too.

(We open with a shot of large, boxy, obviously expensive modern beach house, a far cry from the ramshackle Pad. The camera moves inside, where Charlie works on a box of papers in his office. We hear the door open.)

Charlie: Hey, Gertrude, glad to see you finally showed up. You can start on the livin' room rug. It's looked a little...

(But the large hand holding the needle we see doesn't belong to any cleaning lady. The hand sticks the needle into Charlie's rear. Charlie's eyes bulge, but he finally collapses back in his seat, his eyes open and his face left with an odd little grin. The camera cuts over to Bertanelli, who spits on Charlie before leaving the needle in his jacket pocket and heading back out again.)

(Cut to the arrival of the ferry to Coconut Island. A line of cars drive off the ferry and past a large, octagonal glass-and-steel building with a merry-go-round and a few games and food booths on a short pier at the end. The MonkeeMobile is one of the last cars off.)

Mike: No Mick, you can't ride the merry-go-round. Not if we want to meet Charlie on time.

Micky: Man! I'll come back later.

Peter: He said he'd be right at the Ferry Terminal!

Mike: Maybe we should go on ahead.

Davy: Might as well.

Ursula: May I ask why all of you accepted this man's invitation again when you don't know him?

Peter: He was offering us and the girls a weekend away, so...

Mike: I think there's somethin' else goin' on.

Micky: And that's why we're checking it out ahead of time.

Mike: Let's go on ahead. I think there's somethin' wrong here.

Peter: Maybe we could find a telephone booth and try calling him?

Mike: By that time, we'll be there.

Peter: (Looks around) He's supposed to own a red sports car. I don't see any red sports cars in the parking lot.

Micky: He probably got a business call. You know how these guys are.

Mike: Maybe we'll run into him on the road.

Ursula: Do any of you know where he lives?

Mike: He said he lived in a real big place. We'll find it.

Peter: We could ask for directions.

Micky: It's the resort that we're looking for.

Ursula: Very well. Why don't you ask someone at the Ferry Terminal where his home and the resort are, and we'll move along.

Mike: Sounds good to me.

Peter: All right.

(Cut to a brief shot of the MonkeeMobile pulling into the huge garage next to Charlie's summer house. The camera then moves inside as we get a shot of the guys charging in.)

Mike: (Peers in the door) Hello? Mr. Towland? Anyone home?

Peter: (He peers in next) Anyone there?

Micky: *Checks another room* Mr. Towland? It's us!

Mike: Anyone see him?

Peter: No. (He grins as he heads into a huge living room, done in tropical shades of pink, sea green, and yellow) Wow, look at this equipment! This is top-of-the-line recording equipment, and is that one of those new cassette players?

Mike: Where? (He rushes over to join Peter in the living/recording room) Shit, you're right!

Davy: Would you get a load of all this!

Peter: (He goes to the wrap-around windows that show a view of a deck with a large in-ground pool and the beach beyond it) Look at this view!

Mike: Holy crap. The guy lives next to the beach, and he has a pool.

Peter: Mr. Towland? (He ducks into another room) Here's the kitchen! Wow, it's huge!

Mike: Damn, I wonder where he is?

Micky: *Gawks* Oh my goodness!

Davy: Great, we'll never get Mick outta here.

Peter: I guess Mr. Towland went looking for us.

Mike: (He ducks out into the room between the living room and the office/den) Hey, there's a bar! A big one! (He ducks behind it) Anyone got any requests?

Peter: Michael, that's not ours!

Mike: I don't think he'd mind if we borrowed a little. There's a ton back here.

Micky: Besides, it will be shortly.

Peter: (He heads into the office/den as Mike serves drinks) This must be the office... (He sees Charlie sitting in the seat) Mr. Towland! (He frowns) Wait. There's something weird about your aura. (Eyes widen) Oh man... (He checks takes his wrist...and drops it as if he were stung) Oh no. Oh no, no, no. (He runs back over to the bar area) MICHHHAAAEEELLLL!

Mike: Oh, hi Pete. Did you find a snake in the bathroom or somethin'?

Peter: No, I found Mr. Towland!

Mike: Tell him he's bein' a lousy host. He could at least have picked us up.

Micky: Geez, Pete, you look like you've seen a ghost.

Peter: Micky, that's not funny. Mr. Towland will never be picking anyone up again. He's dead.

Mike: (Raises an eyebrow) Dead? (Sets the bottle of liquor he was holding on the bar)

Micky: What? I was only joking, man!

Peter: I'm not.

Mike: (Sniffs) Now that you mention it, Pete...

(Mike keeps sniffing, right over to Charlie's office. He grabs the needle from his coat.)

Mike: Yeah. Looks like whatever was in this little baby took him out. (Grabs a tissue off Charlie's desk and wraps it around the needle, then hands it to Micky) You're the chemical genius. See anythin' familiar?

Micky: *Holds it up again the light* Hmm... *eyes widen* Oh boy...

Mike: That bad, huh?

Micky: Poison.

Mike: Oh, THAT bad.

Peter: Great. Wonderful. What are we going to tell everyone?

Mike: We're gonna be really cool and call the cops. Let them sort this shit out for once.

Peter: But Michael, someone may think we killed him!

Mike: Why would we kill him? We barely know the guy!

Micky: We're the ones here, and we don't exactly have an alibi.

Mike: But why would the guy kill himself? It's obvious he had it all! Gorgeous house in a great location, great car, great women...

Peter: I don't know, Michael!

Girl: Hello? (A young woman with very long, straight blonde hair in a string bikini, floral wrap skirt, and flip-flops pokes her head in through the French doors that overlook the veranda) Charlie? You there? (She grins and goes over to the dead man) Charlie! How are you? (She sits on his lap. His hand inadvertently ends up in her unmentionables; she grins) You animal, Charlie!

Mike: (Eyes widen) Uh, miss, he's a little, uh...

Peter: Mr. Towland is, um...

Girl: Cold. He's really cold. He needs a blanket before the party arrives.

Mike: The party?

Girl: Sure! There's a party every weekend here. It just goes from house to house and ends at the resort hotel. (Blows "Charlie" a kiss) We'll be by here later, you animal, you! Hope you've warmed up before then! (She trots off. The guys all stare at each other, mouths open.)

Mike: She thought he was livin'!

Peter: I don't believe this!

Micky: Well, hell, if SHE thinks he's alive...who's to say that others would know the difference?

Mike: Micky!

Peter: This is really crazy.

Micky: Do we want everyone thinking we killed him? How about this? When people come in, he's up and about. Afterwards, we're long gone, and no one's the wiser!

Mike: Ok, we'll just wait until the girls show up and the party's over, THEN we'll call the police and explain what happened. It looks more like suicide, anyway. Why would we kill the guy and leave the evidence in his pocket?

Davy: To get the blame off us.

Peter: (Frowns) What's that sound?

Mike: (He looks out the French doors, which are still open after the girl left) Looks like the cavalry's comin'!

("Let's Dance On" begins as a whole hoard of people wander into the room. Some, like a really drunk man in a clashing floral shirt and checked shorts, come with their own drinks. Others still wear bathing suits and wraps and look like they may have just come off the beach.)

("Charlie" is immediately bombarded by all sides. Women sit in his lap and giggle. Men sit next to him, offering him drinks. One man kisses his ear before he's pulled away to discuss his new paintings.)

(Mike hooks Black Beauty up to the music and plays along with the song. Peter sips cocktails with several musicians.)

*Micky hops behind the bar and serves up drinks. Davy sits at the bar, watching the goings-on.*

(Two very big lifeguards come up behind Charlie and start massaging his shoulders. Mike frowns and stops playing for a minute...until he realizes the lifeguards aren't even looking at Charlie's face, just his shoulders. They just keep saying he's tense and are finally distracted by more girls coming in off the beach.)

(The drunk guy keeps asking Micky for "a really big drink for me, an' another one for my friend Charlie, 'cause he could use it, you know?")

*Micky keeps shaking his head. Drunk Guy has had enough.*

(Mike finally puts his guitar down and walks around the room with a tray of drinks. He's asking very discreet questions in the hope of finding out why their host may have killed himself.

(Two more tall girls in bikinis get on either side of Davy and ask him how he knows Charlie and oh, isn't Charlie just a SCREAM tonight?)

*Davy plays along, saying Yes, he is. When the girls leave, Davy rolls his eyes.*

*Micky leans over the bar and whispers in Davy's ear. They grin and make their way over to Charlie.*

(Mike, who is now loading his tray with frozen appetizers just defrosted in the oven, raises an eyebrow as he watches the to head over to Charlie and look like they're talking to him and telling him he's had a little too much to drink, and isn't it time you moved outside and greeted everyone by the pool?)

*Micky stands, hauling Charlie up, making it look like Charlie's rather drunk. Davy takes up the other side. The two start babbling and laughing, headed outside.*

(Mike follows them outside with his tray of appetizers. He takes the tray around, letting everyone have their share and listening in on conversation. Just as he sets the tray down for a group of people in light, airy suits discussing classical music, Davy and Micky run over, both frantic.)

Micky: Mike!

Davy: We lost him!

Mike: (As the song ends) You what? Lost who?

Micky: We lost Charlie!

Mike: How in the hell did you lose Charlie?

Micky: We were walking him around and got stuck in a large crowd...

Davy: The next thing we knew, he was gone!

Mike: (He waves his hand and whispers) Calm down, guys. Corpses don't just get up and walk away. He has to be somewhere. Now, where did you last see him?

Micky: Well...

Davy: We got separated. I thought Mick had him...

Micky: And I thought Davy had him.

Mike: Where did you get separated?

Davy: On the beach somewhere.

Micky: There were a lot of people around.

Mike: Swell. Davy, why don't you see if you can get Pete away from those musicians, and we'll try to find him, before someone down there realizes he ain't livin'?

Davy: Right! *heads back inside*

(Cut to the beach. It's now dark out, but there's still many couples and families taking a night-time stroll. Mike turns to Micky with a frown.)

Mike: Seen anythin' dead yet, 'sides fish?

Micky: Nobody. Literally.

Mike: (As Peter and Davy join them) Hey, guys. Seen Charlie yet?

Davy: No. Where could he have ended up?

Mike: Maybe he got washed out to sea.

Peter: Unless something dragged him, he's awfully big for that.

Micky: He's around here somewhere, just not in plain sight.

Mike: Ok, guys, spread out. He has to be around here somewhere.

("Take A Giant Step" begins as the guys go in different directions. Peter lifts a very small rock and peers under it. Mike tries to push a boulder over, but it won't budge.)

*Micky looks in a couple trees.*

(Mike keeps pushing at his boulder.)

(Peter tries pushing another rock aside...and jumps away, hopping on one foot! An animated crab scuttles out from under him, shaking it's little claw and looking angry.)

(Mike tries pushing on his boulder with his back, but it doesn't work.)

*Davy joins Mike and helps push. The boulder doesn't budge.*

(Peter stumbles over to them and helps push. Nothing.)

*Micky joins them last. Together, the four push at the boulder...*

(It rolls off...to reveal a cave where a little boy plays with Charlie! He has him set up next to the cave and looks like he's going to bury him in the sand!)

Mike: (As the music winds down) Sorry, kid. We have to borrow that guy.

Kid: But I want to bury him in the sand!

Peter: (He gently pushes the boy towards the beach) You should really be going home with your parents.

Kid: But...

Peter: Why don't I take you back to your parents while my friends help this gentleman?

Kid: Awwww!

(Peter gently takes the boy's hand and leads him over to a couple sitting on a blanket a few feet away. Mike turns to the guys.)

Mike: Ok, who gets the honor of leading the stiff back to the part?

(party?)

Micky: *Sighs* I'll do it.

*Micky pulls Charlie up and wraps his arm around his shoulders.*

Mike: We have to keep a better eye on Charlie and make sure we don't lose him like that again.

(Mike puts his arm around Charlie's other side.)

Mike: I can't believe I'm touchin' a stiff.

Micky: We've touched worse.

Peter: (He rejoins them) The little boy is back with his parents. Good thing, too. They were looking for him.

Mike: Good. Let's get back to the party, before everyone starts askin' 'bout Charlie.

(Cut back to the beach house. The party has vanished, and the beach house is now quiet...except for a few groans from a figure laying on the couch, and the voices of the four Monkees dragging one stiff into the house.)

Mike: (As we see Mike and Micky literally drag Charlie into the house) Is it me, or is he heavier than he was before?

Micky: No, he's heavier.

Peter: (Points to the trail of sand behind them) No wonder. That little boy filled him with sand!

Mike: Darn kid. Shouldn't have wandered off. (He grabs a broom from a closet and starts sweeping him off. Peter takes a vacuum cleaner and runs it over him. When he gets to his head...his hair comes off!)

Peter: (Drops the vacuum) I didn't do it! I swear I didn't mean to suck up his hair!

Mike: Calm down, Pete. It's a toupee. (Picks it up) Good one, too. Looked real.

Peter: (Smiles) Oh, thank goodness! I thought I was sucking his hair out!

Mike: No, Pete. (Turns to Davy and Micky) You two go see if there's anyone leftover from the party.

Peter: (Looks up as we hear a moan) What's that noise? I hope no one else is dead!

Micky: Okay. Come on, Dave. *They go over to the couch. Davy peers behind the couch.*

Davy: (Lifts his head) We found the source.

Mike: If there's any other stiffs around here, we're leavin' and tellin' the girls to do the same.

Micky: This one's still breathing.

Drunk: (Looks up from behind the couch) Oh...hey there. Where's Charlie? Wanted to offer him a drink...

Micky: I already told you, you've had enough!

Peter: (Gently pushes the man to the French doors) Why don't you just follow the party back to the resort? I'm sure they have a bar?

Drunk: Yeah. Will Charlie be there?

Peter: Sure!

Davy: He already left for it!

Drunk: 'Kay. Night-night! (He stumbles out.)