(We open in the Cave. It's dark, but the Cave lights up with a beautiful, bright glow. Mike sits on a pillow-covered couch in his chambers, playing Black Beauty. The crystal in his chambers cast a whitish glow.)
Mike: (Finishes singing "Harmony Constant," then leans back) Not bad. Great acoustics in here. I ought to work on songs here more often. Wish I had the time. Em took Katie to visit Lauren and her mini-zoo. *A faint shadow appears on the wall behind Mike. It slowly grows larger, until a pair of hands aim for Mike's temples!*
Mike: (Growls; puts a hand on his stomach and whirls around) Not so fast! (He finds himself staring into a very familiar pair of arms - namely, Alex's) What are you doin' here at this time of night? Don't you have starlets you'd rather be bonking?
Alex: Been there, done that. I got bored. (Frowns) I'm gonna be blunt. I wanna know how you got Ursula into that car of yours, and how can I get her back OUT?
Mike: I ain't tellin' you how she got in the car and I don't know how she got in the crystal, so you can go back to Arizona and just figure out a better way of amusin' yourself. (He turns back to Black Beauty and ignores Alex, hoping he'll go away)
*Alex looks straight into the camera with a dull look, amazed that Mike would think he'd actually just "go away."*
Alex: *makes a face and plants his fists on his hips* You can't seriously think I'm just gonna leave because you tell me to.
Mike: It was worth a shot. (Makes Black Beauty disappear in a dark blue light) I can see we're going to have to do this the hard way. Let me make it short. (Gets in Alex's face) GET. OUT. OF. HERE. NOW. Got that?
Alex: With you, Knight, it's always the hard way. *snorts*
Mike: 'Cause you don't listen.
Alex: Me? You're the one who doesn't cooperate! Just tell me how to get Ursula's CRYSTAL out of the car, and I'll be on my way.
(Mike concentrates. Alex is lifted in the air, legs flailing, surrounded by a dark blue light.)
Alex: Put me down!
Mike: What part of "no" don't you understand? Now, to get rid of you...
Alex: Oh no, you don't!
*A mallet appears in a black light and swings onto Mike's head!*
(The mallot knocks Mike squarely on the head. He collapses, unconcious. The light dissolves from around Alex, who falls flat on the floor.)
Alex: *groans* Ow. *rubs at his rear end* At least it worked. *turns Mike over and puts his hand under his shirt to read his soul; a slow grin forms* So many juicy facts from the great White Knight. He's nervous about having a son. There seems to be dissention in their little band. *quickly grins at the camera* Fears of a dissolving marriage and annoyance with the Scholar over the pregnancy. Heh. *frowns* Dammit! He really DOESN'T know how to get Ursula out! That damn brother of mine put her in the car! *growls as he takes his hand away from Mike's chest* I need to make myself happy. *smirks* I've got an idea.
(Mike groans softly as Alex picks him up and carries him to the couch, laying him gently on it. Mike’s eyes begin to flutter open. He groans more loudly.)
*Alex chuckles as he leans over Mike, practically on top of him, as Mike's eyes flutter. Alex plants a BIG kiss right on Mike's lips!*
Alex: Not bad. ;
Mike: (His eyes finally open all the way...to find Alex practically laying on him, leaning in for another kiss) YUCK! (He springs from the couch, almost knocking Alex over) Get AWAY from me, boy! Blecch! (He wipes his lips with the back of his hand) I told you, I ain't like that!
Alex: *props himself on one knee on the couch* Oh, come on! *grins* You got nice lips, you know that?
Mike: Thanks, but I'd rather not waste 'em on you.
Alex: I'm hurt! *smirks* Come on, you and my brother used to be roomies... *waggles his eyebrows*
Mike: That doesn't mean you can climb all over me. I ain't one of your toys, and I'm married.
Alex: *pushes off of the couch* So? *taps the side of his head* Maybe it's subconscious from my twin.
Mike: Please. The only person Mick's interested in is Lauren. (Smirks) Which I believe you're well aware of.
Alex: Oh, I know that, but you can't seriously think that he hasn't kept certain things to himself. After all, before meeting Lauren, he was awfully lonely at times.
Mike: Mick, lonely? He chased girls as much as Davy did!
Alex: "Chased" is the key word. How many do you think he actually caught? (Smirks) You know how wonderful of an imagination he has.
Mike: He ain't interested in me that way! We got wives we love!
Alex: *moves closer to Mike; grins* Who could resist those tight jeans!
Mike: (Snarls) Thanks, but I doubt it. I'd feel it. Mick's only interested in Lauren and makin' chemical explosions.
Alex: Now, yeah. *shakes his head and sighs* But when you chase after girls and all they do is giggle because they're being chased by the clown, and then end up going to Davy, you gotta do something to make yourself feel better. That's what the imagination's for.
Mike: You never saw the pin-ups of Jane Fonda in his room.
Alex: I've seen them! I have his memories, or did you forget that? I KNOW what's been through his mind! I'm actually being straight with you. *smirks* Heh, pun not intended, but fitting.
Mike: No, you ain't...
Alex: *legitimately serious look* Yes, I am.
Mike: I know Micky. I shared a room with him for three years! He's one hundred percent girl-crazy.
Alex: As far as you knew.
Mike: He probably wouldn't be best friends with Davy if he wasn't. (Smirks) 'Sides, Sheila created you. I'll bet she put some things into you that weren't in Mick, maybe even without realizin' it.
Alex: *makes a face* Yeah, she created me, and she said I'm the evil version of Micky. Why would she lie to me, hm? But, hey, if you don't believe me, why don't you just ask Micky?
Mike: 'Cause I know him. He only wants one person in this universe, and that's Lauren.
Alex: Now he does. I'm talking about those three years. *smirks* Think you could ask him how he got Ursula in the car while you're at it? It'd save me from having to ask him how he had to to get her in there.
Alex: *grins in Mike's face* I'm gonna find out somehow. *leans closer and whispers in Mike's ear* Say hi to my brother for me, okay?
(Mike answers with a fist aimed in Alex's direction.)
*Alex disappears in a black light before the fist can connect.*
(Mike ends hitting air instead. He swings so hard, he ends up on the floor.)
Mike: (Roars) Damn that little jerk! (His roars echo in the cave.)
*We see Micky enter the cave. He glances around. His eyes widen when he finally sees Mike on the floor.*
Micky: Mike! *jogs over to him*
Mike: (Looks up; sighs) Hi, Mick. (Stands and brushes himself off) No beatin' 'round the bush. Alex was here.
Micky: *makes a face* I thought I felt the warning as I got closer. What happened?
Mike: He wanted to know how to get Urse out of the car and out of the crystal. I wouldn't tell him, so he knocked me out, and I wouldn't be surprised if he got the info he wanted anyway.
Micky: *smirks* It would be kinda hard to get that answer from you, since I was the one who put Urse in the car.
Mike: Yeah, but now he knows who put Urse in the car...and who to annoy to get her out. (Frowns) You didn't bring her, did you?
Micky: *shakes his head* No, I wanted to fly. *sighs* Besides, he already annoys me. What's one more thing?
(Mike sits on the crystal couch.)
Mike: Maybe we ought to leave, just in case Alex decides to come back for more. (He sits as far away from Micky as possible.)
Micky: *notices Mike moving away from him; tilts his head* Alex didn't do anything to you besides knock you out, did he?
Mike: (Looks at his knees) No.
Micky: *shakes his head and sits on the couch, getting closer to Mike* Then why don't I believe you?
Mike: It's fine, Mick. He just...well, he was his usual jerk-off self.
Micky: You aren't looking at me, Mike. There's definitely smething wrong!
Mike: He said a few stupid things.
Micky: What'd he say?
Mike: Stuff, that's all. I shouldn't have listened. He talks shit. (Runs his fingers over the smooth crystal)
Micky: *rolls his eyes* You're acting really weird, even more closed off than usual, Mike. *sighs* What did he talk shit about?
Mike: (Very soft) You.
Micky: *eyebrows raise* Me? Did I hear you right?
Mike: Yeah. (Finally looks up at Micky) Mick, when we were sharin' a room, did you...I mean, did you...
Micky: *pauses a moment* Huh? Spit it out, Mike!
Mike: Micky, how do you feel about me?
Micky: Well, you're kinda annoying me at the moment, but you're still my friend.
Mike: Am I just a friend?
Micky: Yeah. *pauses; grins* Though you do kinda act like an enemy sometimes. ;)
Mike: No, Mick, I mean...do you...Alex sorta said that...you like me.
Micky: Well, of course... *realization hits; appears to pale slightly, but quickly makes a face* No! No way! Not like that!
Mike: (Growls) That's what I figured. Damn it! I let Alex mess with me again.
Mike: Oh, Alex was gettin' on my goat, sayin' you liked me an' shit.
Micky: *pales a bit more* Well...not like that...now.
Mike: What? (Raises his eyebrows and turns to Micky)
Micky: *shakes his head and waves his hands* No, definitely not now! *sighs; rubs at his face* It happened sometime shortly after we all moved in together. Dave kept going off with his girlfriend du jour and Pete was still hanging out his his buddies almost every night. I was lonely, and you were the only one hanging around the Pad besides me. Of course, you were always on the bandstand, picking at your guitar. *holds his index and middle fingers close together, but not touching* It was only fleeting. *puts his head in his hands* I was afraid when Alex started latchng onto us this would come out.
Mike: (Sighs) It's ok, Mick, if you're over it now.
Micky: *looks up & nods* Yeah, I am. I just wish it didn't even need to come out. *punches a fist into his other hand* Man, I'd love to get my hands on Alex. *makes a face* I didn't mean it...oh, hell, you know what I mean.
Mike: Yeah, I know what you meant. You wanna pound him straight into the crystal rock wall.
*Footsteps are heard entering the Cave. Davy walks up to the couch.*
Davy: Is this a private meeting, mates?
Micky: *shakes his head* No. The more the merrier.
Mike: Yeah, join right in. Just escapin' the family.
Davy: Is that wot you're calling it? (Looks at his best friend) You, too, Mick?
Micky: I was gonna work on something in the lab.
Davy: I was thinking of practicing with the suit.
Davy: *grins* I 'ope you two weren't talking about me before I came in. ;)
Micky: Not really. *looks away*
Mike: Nahhh. Just talkin' shop.
Davy: *nods* Did Mick blow up something? 'E's got the look 'e gets when 'e's blown up something and doesn't wanna tell us.
Micky: *turns to Davy* So what if I did?
Davy: Just saying, Mick, that's all. *turns to Mike* You must've really needed to escape, Mike. You're quieter than you usually are.
Mike: Yeah. (Smiles) I'm a new father, after all. Lauren an' Em are at our house now, fawnin' over our new kid. I just needed some time to myself.
Davy: *grins* Oh, yeah, how is Em and the new little bundle?
Mike: Loud. He was cryin' the moment he came out of Em. (Grins) But otherwise, he's beautiful. Has black hair and his pop's nose. Katie's thrilled. All she can talk about is "my baby brother Robbie."
Micky: That's cute. I'll bet you're happy than Em won't be complaining the way she was anymore.
Mike: Nahh, now we can both complain about bein' woken up at 3 so Rob can eat.
Micky: Or that. ;)
Davy: *leans on the back of the couch; nudges Micky* Speaking of new family members, any luck yet?
Micky: *frowns a bit; shakes his head* No, not yet.
Mike: The way you two go at it, you'll probably be announcin' Lauren's next pregnancy tomorrow.
Micky: *makes a face* Funny. *rolls his eyes*
Alex's Voice: I thought it was.
Micky: *looks around; growls* Alex! Where are you?
Mike: Show yourself! (Makes his sword appear)
Davy: Back for seconds, Alex?
*Alex appears, sitting on the floor, leaning against Mike's legs. He grins up at him.*
(Mike jumps away, shaking his legs and growling.)
Mike: Alex, get outta here, before the three of us turn on the security system and MAKE you!
Alex: Why would I wanna leave? I've been getting some wonderful entertainment out of you three.
Micky: *shakes a fist* I'll give you entertainment!
Alex: *smirks* I bet you would, brother.
Mike: At the business end of my sword. (Holds out his sword to Alex's throat) You ever talk that way about any of my friends EVER, and I mean EVER, and I WILL cut you to ribbons. Got that?
Alex: *sarcastic* Oh, I am so scared. Look at me shaking!
Davy: (Pokes Alex in the rear with HIS sword) How about now, Alex?
Alex: *turns his head* Watch it with that thing, short stuff.
Micky: *points his dagger at Alex in a lower general area* Or now, perhaps?
Davy: You get outta 'ere and go back to whatever hole you crawled out of, Alex.
Alex: Gee, I must've struck a sore point somewhere.
Mike: Yeah, you showed up.
Micky: I'll give you a sore point!
Alex: Nah, I have a better idea. *disappears again*
Davy: Damn it, 'e's playin' bloody 'ide n' seek again.
Micky: *frustrated growl* Get BACK here, Alex!
Mike: I wish there were an easier way to find him when he pulls this shit.
*Suddenly, Mike feels pressure on his temples, as though he's being muddled.*
Mike: Wha... (he slumps into something invisible, his sword falling from his hand)
Davy: Mike! What's wrong?
Mike: (Moans) Alex...no...
Alex's Voice: *laughs* The poor Knight has a headache!
Micky: Dammit, Alex, show yourself and quit messing around, so we can tear you apart!
Davy: Get your blasted 'ands off poor Mike! 'E didn't do nothin' to you...recently.
Alex's Voice: *closer to Micky now* Tear me apart? You might enjoy that a bit too much, brother.
Micky: *jumps* Alex! Dammit, where the hell are you!?
Alex's Voice: *now closer to Davy* The Savage is a little jumpy. Want me to tell you why, Lord?
Davy: (Wrinkles his nose) If I 'ad your bad breath on me, I'd be jumpy, too. What did you eat this aftahnoon, a garlic and onion sandwich?
Alex: *appears closer to Mike again; to Davy* How'd you guess?
Mike: (Shaking his head to clear it) Alex, get outta here! (Starts to reach for his sword)
Alex: *makes his own sword appear* Okay boys, now we play a game.
(Mike is about to reach for his sword...but stops again, his eyes closing, as Alex rubs his temples. He pants hard.)
Mike: Alex, no...
Davy: GET AWAY FROM HIM!
Mike: (Trying to fight the muddling) No!
*Alex chuckles and grips his sword. He lightly drags the tip of the sword along Mike's arm.*
Micky: STOP IT!
Mike: Alex, no... (He tries to struggle, but he's sluggish and slow)
Davy: What do you want?
Alex: *looks right at Micky* I want to know who to get Ursula out of the car, so I can work on getting her out of the crystal.
Mike: Micky, don't tell him...
(Mike winces as the sword cuts through the fabric of his shirt and into his arm...and the scar made many years ago by Kristoff.)
Alex: *grins down at Mike* Does that hurt, Knight?
Mike: Like I'd give you the satisfaction of knowin', Alex.
Micky: NO! *finally dives at Alex, sending them both tumbling, Alex's sword clattering to the floor*
Mike: (As he topples the other way) MICK!
*Alex and Micky roll around on the floor, kicking up some cartoon dust. There's moans, groans, and various other fistfight sound effects. When the dust clears, Micky is sitting alone on the floor, breathing heavily.*
Davy: (Goes to Mike and Micky on the floor) What happened? Where's Alex?
Micky: *puffing* I don't know. He just disappeared.
Mike: Whatever you did, Mick, he's gone...for now.
Davy: (Grins at Micky) The only problem with your "angry mode," Mick, is you nevah save anyone else a piece!
Micky: *shrugs* Sorry, Dave. I really tried to have some control that time.
Mike: Yeah, or Alex would have been out the side of the wall and still goin'.
Micky: And that's how I normally feel about him, anyway.
Davy: Mike, are you ok?
Mike: (Nods) Yeah, I'm fine. Alex didn't push too far. It ain't bleedin' hard.
Davy: Maybe we ought to get outta here, before Alex tries again.
Micky: Good idea.
Mike: (Makes a cloth appear and presses it over his wound to stop the bleeding) Let's go. I brought one of my cars. We'll drive home.
Micky: *makes a face* Mike, do you mind if I fly? You two can take the car.
Mike: (Nods, understanding) Ok.
Micky: I'll see you guys later. *heads out of the Cave*
Davy: Did I miss something?
Mike: (Nods and sighs) Yeah, Dave. It ain't nothin' you need to know about. Happened years ago. Mick's just gotta sort some things out.
Davy: *shrugs* That does explain 'im literally taking off on us.
Mike: I'm gonna tell him to talk to Lauren the next time I see him. I'll help to get all this out in the open with her, and she'll probably be able to help him.
Davy: Now, you've got me really curious, Mike.
Mike: Ain't nothin' you need to know about, kiddo.
Mike: Come on. (Grins) Wanna go to my place and see Robbie? He'll probably be sleepin', but his mama and sister love to show him off. ;)
Davy: I'd love to, mate! Lead the way.
Mike: Let's go. (He picks up his sword, and the two head out)