So, everyone ready to finally begin this year's holiday stories?

Mike: Yup.

Peter: Yay! Christmas!

Katie: Cwismiss!

Micky: You bet!

Davy: Ready, mates.

(We open at Lauren and Micky's house. The twins lean over boxes marked "Xmas" in Micky's messy scrawl on the floor while Lauren hangs their stockings. There's already garlands and poinsettas everywhere.)

Lauren: *to the twins* Pull everything out, and we'll figure out where to put it when your daddy gets back.

Mick: Okay, Mommy!

(The sky outside of the house is rapidly darkening, though it's afternoon. Onyx lays on a couch, ignoring all of the fuss. Lights on the house can be seen even inside.)

Lauren: *glances out the nearest window* Speaking of, I wish your daddy would hurry up with that tree. The sky is getting pretty dark. :P

(There's a knock on the door.)

Voice 1: (Texas accent) Yes, Em, I have everythin'.

Voice 2: (A little’ girl’s voice) Hello?

Lauren: Keep working on that stuff, kids. Mommy will be right back.

*Lauren opens the front door.*

(As at Thanksgiving, Emma, Mike, Davy, Daphne, and Katie stand there. Emma carries something loaf-shaped covered with foil. Mike carries another loaf-shaped foil thing. Daphne carries Elizabeth's basket.)

Daphne: Hi, Lauren. How's everything going?

Katie: Hi, Auntie Lauwen! (Reaches up to give her a hug)

Lauren: So far so good. *kneels to give Katie a hug; stands back up* Just waiting for Mick to return with the tree.

Katie: (Looks around) Where twee? We gotta twee!

Mike: Yeah, we put our tree up at the Pad last week, on Em's insistance. I don't know why we're botherin'. We're goin' away in a few days.

Emma: It's for the kids, Mike.

Mike: (Mutters) It's 'cause you n' Mick n' Pete can't live without a damn tree.

Emma: So? (Katie runs over to the twins as Emma takes the loaf from Mike) Lauren, where do you want the Cranberry and Pumpkin Bread?

Lauren: Just take it into the kitchen, on the counter.

(Emma takes the two loaves of bread over to the kitchen. Davy and Daphne settle on the couch. Mike takes Katie's coat and hands it to Lauren, along with everyone else's.)

Mike: Damn, it's cold out there. This is the first time Katie's ever hadda wear this big, heavy coat.

Lauren: *hefts the coat* Oof. You're not kidding, Mike.

Mike: The weather says snow by tonight. I think the weather man's been takin' a few too many sips of the ol' Christmas cheer. :p

Davy: *Shrugs* Looks kinda dahk out there. :P

Mike: Yeah, but this is Southern California.

Katie: (Runs over to the twins) What'cha doin'?

Shelly: We're pulling out dec'rations!

Katie: Yay! Cwisimiss dec'rations?

Mick: Yup! *pulls out a string of garland*

(There's another knock on the door as Katie leans in a box and pulls out a string of lights. Mike goes to the door this time and reveals Peter, Valerie, and Jordan in his father's arms. Valerie has a covered plate and stacks of boxes; Peter has bottles of soda in his free hand.)

Valerie: Hi, guys. Here's the party trays and the soda for the kids. I'll go back and get the liquor for the parents. ;)

Peter: Hi, gang! Hope you like every sandwich known to humankind.

(Jordan just waves, blushing.)

Valerie: Sophie worked on these just for us, so...enjoy!

Mike: (Grins as Peter sets Jordan down) I'll go for the liquor.

Lauren: *grins* Thanks for the sandwiches!

Valerie: You're welcome. (Makes a face at Mike) I'll get it. (She heads to the car as Peter hands their coats to Lauren)

Peter: I hope she remembers to get our suitcases, too, just in case we get that big blizzard they're forcasting.

Lauren: More coats.

Mike: Whaddya need suitcases for? This is Southern California. We'll be lucky to get a light drizzle.

Peter: Mike, it's cold enough out there for snow.

(Valerie comes back in with a bag with bottles of liquor and two suitcases and a bag, one under her arm. Peter immediately grabs the bag from her.)

Valerie: It was a great idea to have a tree-trimming-going-away party. This is going to be fun.

Mike: Speakin' of...where IS the tree?

Katie: (Looks around) "Where's Unca Micky?

Mick: "Daddy's getting our tree!"

Jordan: "That's so cool! We have two trees, one we set up in the main parlor, and a giant one some florist guys set up in the ballroom."

Katie: "We put our tree up yesterday! I love Christmas trees! It was so much fun, even though Mama and Papa kept fussing."

Jordan: "I like this Christmas thing! Daddy told me about it! It's about peace and joy and love and giving and people being nice to each other! :D"

Katie: "And don't forget Santa! He's gonna bring us our presents in a few weeks! I wanna tricycle!"

Shelly: "I can't wait to see what I get!"

Mick: "I want a hula hoop!"

Mike: Where IS Mick? What did he do, drive to Canada to buy a da...darn tree? :p

Emma: (Comes out with sliced cranberry and pumpkin bread) Knowing him, he wanted to chop it down himself.

*There's a bit of a commotion from outside. Three voices can be heard all taking at once.*

Lauren: Speaking of Mick... *goes to the door*

Micky: *stands at the door, hand raised to knock; grins* Hiya, babe. We got the tree. :D

Mike: And you're still alive? Imagine that?

*Nyles and Jack wave, holding the other end of the tree.*

Peter: Is it a big tree?

Micky: Haul it in, guys!

*The three guys carry in a rather tall tree, tied with rope.*

Mike: Oh this should be good. And here I thought I was missin' the Three Stooges tonight.

Katie: BIIIIGGGG twee! :D

Jordan: Wow! :o

*The trio stands the tree up, the top just misses the ceiling by less than an inch.*

*Lauren looks the tree up and down. She rolls her eyes.*

Peter: Whoa!

Valerie: Um, is there going to be enough room for the angel?

Lauren: No.

Micky: Of course there's room!

Mike: Looks like the Three Wise Men forgot to measure the length of the celing.

Katie: "That's the biggest tree I've ever seen! It's MUCH bigger than our tree!"

(Jordan just sits and stares at the tree with his little jaw hanging open.)

Micky: *glares at Mike* The angel will fit.

Katie: Dec'wate! Now!

Mike: Hold your horses, Cowgirl. We gotta put the lights on and open the darn thing first.

Emma: Micky, dare we ask where you got a tree that size?

*Micky grins. So does Nyles. Jack shrugs.*

Mike: Nope.

Emma: Who wants to do the daunting task of cutting the ropes and praying it doesn't overwhelm us?

*Jack and Nyles point at Micky.*

Jack: *shrugs* We already know what the tree looks like without the ropes.

Mike: Mick, it's your house and it's your life.

Micky: *turns to Lauren* The scissors, babe?

Lauren: Looks like I'm an accomplice. *gets the scissors and hands them to him* Here ya go, Mick.

Micky: Thank you. Ready everyone? *holds the scissors up to the rope*

(Everyone stands FARRRR back. Peter grabs Jordan, who's still gawking.)

*Micky snips the rope, sending branches flailing everywhere and pretty much completely covering Micky.*

Mike: (Rolls his eyes) Is it too late to get another one?

Peter: (Looks out the window) Yes, it is. It's starting to snow!

Micky: I'm fine, it's fine! *spits a little* Looks great! *pauses* Little full...lotta sap...

Mike: Don't get NEAR me.

Lauren: It's too easy.

Mike: How the hell are we gonna get the lights on there?

Valerie: Can anyone find them?

Micky: *emerges from the tree* It just needs a little trimming, that's all. It'll look great, you'll see!

Mike: Uh-HUH.

(We go into a fast instrumental of "O Christmas Tree" as Micky trims the monstrosity as well as he can.)

*Branches and pine needles fly everywhere.*

(Everyone ducks away. Emma takes the food into the kitchen so they can eat without being attacked by flying flora.)

(The boys rejoin Micky out in the living room. He now has the tree down to a semi-manageble size. Mike and Peter look for lights while Davy helps Micky get the massive piles of branches into his workshop in the garage for wreaths, garlands, and centerpieces.)

(Mike grumbles as he pulls out a huge ball of tangled lights.)

*Nyles tests the eggnog.*

(Peter grins. He closes his eyes. A blue light surrounds the tangled balls. When it subsides, they lay in neat rows.)

*Jack watches the kids. It's safer.* ;)

(Davy and Micky argue over who's gonna put the angel on top while Peter and Mike begin the lights.)

(Emma, Lauren, and Daphne walk out as the boys argue. Daphne takes Elizabeth upstairs so she can get something resembling a nap.)

(Cut to Peter and Mike, tangled in lights.)

(Emma shakes her head and goes through the garland.)

(Cut back to Peter and Mike, who now try to get the lights on the top of the tree. Mike stands on a ladder, but falls off and into Peter, knocking them BOTH over. Emma, now sorting ornaments, groans.)

(Mike tells Peter to stand back, as he's going to plug in the lights. Peter does. Mike plugs them in...but nothing happens.)

*Micky and Davy roll around on the floor. Nyles hiccups, then grabs the angel and puts it on the top of the tree. The other two still fight.*

(Mike growls and tosses the lights to Peter to figure out. He grabs Micky and Davy by their collars and drag them to their feet, yelling at them and telling them to knock it off.)

(Peter plugs in the lights...and they work just fine. Mike makes a face.)

(Emma and Lauren put the garland on themselves while Mike scolds Davy and Micky and Jack and Peter bring out more ornaments.)

(Valerie and Jack bring out the kids to help with the tree. We end with everyone putting ornaments on the tree, even Micky and Davy, who sport some very nice black eyes.)

Emma: (Grins wickedly as she brings out two icepacks for Micky and Davy) Nice going, guys.

Mike: What happened to peace on earth, goodwill towards men?

Micky and Davy: *pointing at each other; in unison* He started it!

Valerie: Grow up, you two. The kids are behaving better.

Katie: (To Little Mick, as she hangs a soft yarn-wrapped wreath) "How come Unca Micky n' Unca Davy have purple eyes an' ice?"

Mick: "I think they were wrestling."

Katie: "Remind me never to wrestle with them."

Jordan: "This is fun! I love putting pretty stuff on Christmas trees, even if Mommy won't let me put the shiny glass balls on. :D"

Katie: "Mama won't let me put the glass ornaments Nana gave us, either. She's afraid I'll drop them."

(Emma and Lauren stand by the window overlooking the veranda, watching the snow, which is already up to the door.)

Emma: I definately don't like the look of this.

Lauren: Me either. Thought I'd seen the end of snow storms like this when I left New England.

Emma: This is a rarity for me, too. Southern New Jersey only gets a little more snow than Southern California! I haven't seen snow like this since I was a teenager!

Mike: (Joins the girls) What'cha doin', waitin' for Santa? ;)

Emma: At the rate that snow's coming down, Santa may end up needing Rudolph and every neon sign in Los Angeles to find US! (Indicates the storm)

Mike: (Eyes widen) Oh shit...that's not just a few little flakes...

Emma: That, dear, is commonly known as a blizzard.

Lauren: You know, the kind that keeps you indoors for several hours because there's no way that the snow plows can keep up with it.

Mike: You mean...

Emma: (Nods) I do believe we're snowed in.