Everyone ready to explore Zlotnick?

Mike: Yeah, as long as we don't encounter anymore cats the size of the Empire State Buildin'. :p

Peter: (A bit timid) Me.

Micky: I kinda liked the Drapoel. ;)

Davy: I'm ready.

(We open with the guys walking across the fields towards the city as "What Am I Doin' Hangin' Round?" begins. Peter leans over to sniff some pink and yellow flowers. Something taps his shoulder. He turns around...and sees a huge cartoon bee with a big grin. He screams, drops the flowers, and runs off.)

(Michael raises his eyebrows at tiny blue bears with wings who drink honey and chase green fish in the river.)

*Three different colored, furry monsters follow Micky. He stops and the monsters stop. He turns, sees them, then turns forward again. It takes a moment, then he screams and runs off.*

*Davy comes across a little penguin like creature with a miniature umbrella shaped thing sticking out of its head. He kneels to pet it, but the creature grows ten times its original size. Davy runs away.*

(Mike and Peter shake hands with a tall, furry brown creature carrying an umbrella. He has a long nose like an anteater and big, shiny brown eyes.)

(Mike is about to move along...when Peter points at his feet. They lean down and see tiny orange, almost human-like creatures moving around, building homes from sand and grass. They tip-toe around the beings and their community.)

*Micky hides behind a large mound and, pausing to catch his breath, notices the mound is breathing. He turns and finds it's sniffing him, then licks him until Micky is sopping wet.* :P

(Peter laughs and pets the mound, which licks him, too, though not quite as fiercely as Micky. :D)

(Mike hands Micky a towel. ;) )

*Micky thanks Mike for the towel.* :P

(Peter rides the fuzzy, mossy creature Micky hid behind in some obvious stop-motion animation. ;) )

(Mike stomps ahead again, pushing past some huge, almost tree-sized flowers...when one unopened flower opens, shows very sharp teeth, and tries to grab him. He just manages to get out of the way. :o )

*Little turtle like creatures with wings chase after Davy.*

*Twelve inch tall mushrooms chase Micky.*

(Mike grabs both guys and pushes them down into the tall grass...letting the mushrooms fly into the open mouths of the turtles, satisfying the hungry creatures and making them fly away with full bellies. ;) )

(Peter frowns. He feels rain, but there's no clouds in the sky. He looks up...and sees a huge, shaggy dog-like creature licking his lips and holding a knife and a fork. Peter shrieks and runs off. The shaggy creature shrugs, tosses his utensils away, and wanders off.)

(Mike finally catches up with Emilio as the music ends, followed by the others.)

Mike: Man, this place is freakin' NUTS!

Emilio: Really?

Mike: You mean, you didn't see the big, fuzzy guy and the huge penguin and the flyin' turtles and the mushrooms an' all that crazy shit?

Emilio: Oh, I saw them, but they don't bother me.

Mike: Come on, they coulda eaten us! A flower with dental instruments for teeth thought I was his snack!

Emilio: *sighs* They wouldn't have eaten you. They were trying to greet you, but you freaked out and freaked them out!

Mike: I don't call tryin' to grab a guy and shove you in their mouth greetin'.

Emilio: Maybe we should just keep going.

Mike: Let's get to your place.

Peter: Are there any monsters in the city?

Emilio: Monsters by my standard, no. Monsters by yours...yeah. ;) :P

Micky: Maybe someone ELSE will get licked next time.

Peter: I thought that was sweet! :)

Davy: I thought so too. ;)

(Mike snickers.)

*Micky grumbles.* :P

Mike: Hey, Emilio, you ever find yourself a girl...or whatever robots date? ;)

Emilio: *actually blushes a little* Um, yes, I did.

Peter: I'll bet she's nice. :)

Emilio: Oh, she is. :)

Micky: But you're not gonna tell us about her, are you?

Emilio: Um, no. *shakes his head* :">

Mike: Havin' problems?

Emilio: Well, no. I'm just not comfortable talking about that. :P

Micky: And we finally have a difference. 'Milo's got humility. ;)

Mike: He's actually progressed past you. ;)

Micky: Hey... :P

Peter: Come on, guys, let's go into the...

(Suddenly, there's a horrible noise, a screech worse than a million fingernails on a chalkboard. All four Monkees drop to their knees, covering their ears.)

Mike: STOP IT! WHAT IS IT?

Peter: OW! MAKE IT GO AWAY!

Emilio: That's the harmonic destructors! :P X-(

Mike: AHHHH! TURN 'EM OFF!

Emilio: I wish I could!

Micky: WHERE'S A PAIR OF EARMUFFS WHEN YOU NEED THEM?!

(The noise stops as arruptly as it began. The four Monkees shakily get to their feet.)

Peter: That's what we're here to stop?

Emilio: Yes.

Mike: (Wiggles a finger in his ear) If it doesn't punture my eardrums first.

Davy: *sticks a finger in his ear* It's still bouncing around in there. :P

Peter: Maybe we should imagine ourselves earmuffs if the Destructors are that bad.

Mike: Yeah. (He closes his eyes...but the light flickers and produces a head of cabbage. Mike winces) Ow. That didn't work. What's goin' on?

Peter: (Rubs his head) I don't know. I haven't felt right since we've landed. Everything has such strange vibes, and I've never seen such odd auras!

Emilio: Oh, dear. I was afraid your powers wouldn't work the same here. :P

Micky: Great. :P

Mike: (Rubs the back of his head) No wonder we felt weird in your ship. There's somethin' on this planet that does weird shit to our powers.

Peter: (Puts his head on his hand) I really don't feel well. Is there somewhere I can lie down?

Emilio: *nods* Yes, we're close to my home. We can go rest there for a bit.

Mike: (Puts his arms around a woozy Peter) Maybe we'd better call a cab, or whatever the equivellent is in this world.

Peter: I'm ok, just...my head hurts...

Emilio: I could get us a space cab.

Mike: You do that.

*Emilio make the motion to do a whistle with two fingers. He does so but there's no sound.*

Micky: What's with the silent whistle?

Emilio: Makes it easier to call a cab.

(A yellow blur comes carreening around a couple of real boulders before it stops suddenly before the boys...revealing a real, normal cab without any tires. The yellow checkered vehicle floats on the air. A plump, blue-skinned man in a jacket and yellow cap pokes his head out. He has frizzy reddish hair and small, flabby eyes. He grins.)

Man: (British Cockney accent) Yer rang, guv'nah? ;)

Emilio: Yes, I did. Thank you. In you go, fellas. ;)

(They all climb in. Emilio gets the passenger seat; the four Monkees squeeze in back. The cab speeds into the city.)

(The city sparkles like a thousand diamonds as the cab races at speeds faster than any known Earth vehicle. The boys are thrust back into the seat; everything seems to blur as the cab winds through animated cars, with the cab driver's colorful explectives occasionally heard through the din of hundreds of speeding flying cars...but there's an omnious note as we see huge, armored vehicles, both on the ground and on land.)

(The cab stops suddenly in front of an elevated home that looks like a cross between "The Jetsons" and a 30s Art Deco movie set. We see all four Monkees plastered on the window between the driver and Emilio before they slide off.)

Cab Driver: 'Ere ya go, sir. (Frowns at the guys) 'Ey, you boys ok? Was that too slow?

Micky: Just...fine... :P

Mike: My stomach may feel fine in another thousand years. :p

(Peter groans.)

Emilio: Thank you, sir. The ride was just fine. :)

Cab Driver: (As the boys stumble out, followed by a perfectly composed Emilio) Any time, guv'nah. (Hands Emilio a piece of plastic) 'Ere's me card. Rocco's the name. If ya evah need a ride, just whistle. (He blurs off again.)

*Emilio pockets the card.*

Mike: (Wobbly; supports a rather green Peter) Oh, man, does EVERYONE here drive like that lunatic?

Emilio: Of course they do.

(Peter groans more loudly. :-&)

Mike: Um, Emilio, I hate to hurry things, but I think we're gonna need to be headin' inside. Pete don't look too good, and I could use somethin' for my head.

(They quickly make their way into a sunny, spacious area, surrounded by sleek, plush furnature straight out of a 30s movie. Mike helps Peter over to a couch and lays him down.)

Peter: Thanks, Mike. (Looks up at Emilio) Where's your bathroom?

Emilio: *points down a hall* Down there, last door on the left.

Peter: Thanks. (Races in the direction Emilio indicated)

Mike: (Sits on the couch) So, this is home. Anythin' to drink? I'm sure Micky could eat your whole kitchen by now, too. ;)

Micky: And quite easily. ;)

Emilio: *laughs* I'm sure, Micky. Yes, I have several choices for drinks, actually. Whatever you want, I have. ;)

Mike: Give me somethin' quick, strong, and painless.

Emilio: I can do that. *goes into the kitchen and comes back with a clear liquid* Here you go. *hands it to Mike*

(We hear the sound of muffled stomach relieving off-camera.)

Mike: (makes a face as he takes the liquid) Oh man, that crazy car ride REALLY got to Pete. :p

Davy: I 'ope you 'ave a self-cleaning bathroom, mate.

Emilio: I do, actually. ;)

Mike: (Holds up the drink) Cheers. (Kicks it back and drinks the entire contents at once. He frowns) That tasted sorta... (His eyes widen, and he passes out)

Emilio: He said he wanted something strong.

Micky: *claps a hand on Emilio's shoulder* 'Milo, don't worry. He shouldn't have chugged it like that.

Peter: (He comes out, wiping his lips, as Mike passes out. He runs to his best friend's side) Michael! Is he ok? :o

Davy: 'E's fine, mate. Just couldn't 'andle 'is drink is all.

Mike: (Shakes his head, as he and Peter sit on the couch) Oh, man... (Looks at Emilio) What the hell was IN that? I'm usually good at holdin' my liquor! Ain't never had somethin' that got to me like that!

Emilio: I should have warned you that it might be stronger than you're used to. :P

Mike: That's puttin' it mildly! (There's a knock at the door as Mike rubs his head)

Emilio: I'll get it. *goes over to the door; opens it and is immediately smothered by a girl who looks oddly familiar, but has blonde hair*

Peter: (Squints) Hey, don’t we know you?

Mike: (Gets up) Lauren?

Emilio: *grins* Looks just like her, doesn't she? :">

Girl: Hi! I'm Beth. :)

Micky: Damn.

Peter: (Rubs his head) Huh?

Emilio: This is my girlfriend, Beth. :)

Mike: (Grins) Nice pickin'. ;)

Peter: Your feet aren't backwards!

Beth: *chuckles* Why, thank you! ;)

Davy: Petah... :P ;)

Peter: Do you walk into doors?

Beth: Not unless I'm drunk. ;)

Peter: There's something strange about you, Beth. Your aura is...funny.

Mike: There's somethin' strange 'bout everythin' we've run into here. :p

Emilio: Besides, you fellas are still getting used to being here. I wish I could've prepared you better.

Mike: Tell us more about these "harmonic destructors."

Emilio: There really isn't much to tell as I don't know much about them. They suddenly showed up and go off at any time. They're basically beginning to ruin the planet. :P

Mike: (Rubs his ears) Yeah, so we heard

Peter: (Looks at Beth) Your aura is weird.

Beth: Me?

Emilio: What're you talking about?

Peter: Your aura isn't right. Are you from this planet, Beth?

Beth: *shakes her head* No, I'm not. Most people on this planet aren't from here, anyway. It's basically a melting pot.

Peter: Do you know anything about the harmonic destructors?

Beth: Just that they're hurting everyone here. :P

Mike: Pete, what are you sayin'?

Peter: Mike, SOMEONE knows we're here. I bet they've watched Emilio the whole time. (Puts his head in his hands) Someone chased us, shot at us, tried to keep us from coming here.

Mike: (Looks at Beth) We think some of these "strangers" passin' through might be the cause of all your troubles.

Beth: Well, I suppose that would make sense, but this planet is typically peaceful. We don't worry about who comes and goes.

Mike: Well, someone's aimin' to do somethin' nasty to what goes into your ears. Any crazy folks got somethin' against Zlotnick or it's music and arts...or the galaxy's music in general?

Beth: It's possible.

Peter: (He stands shakily) Beth, I want to do something.

Beth: *frowns* What?

Emilio: Wait a minute.

Micky: Pete?

(Peter goes to Beth and gently lays his hand on her shoulder...then frowns.)

Peter: Beth, you're hiding something. Something very important.

Beth: Me? What? No! *shakes her head*

Peter: (Closes his eyes...but then winces) I don't feel right. I can't concentrate. Something about the vibes here...

Mike: (He joins Peter as he pulls back; narrows his eyes) What you hidin', girl?

Beth: Nothing! :-O

Emilio: Now, hold on a minute...

Micky: *sighs* Here we go.

Peter: Your aura is dark.

Beth: Huh?

Mike: Auras. He knows how people...and everythin' else livin' sorta livin’ or formerly livin'...is feelin'. (Looks at Beth) Includin' you, girl. He knows when someone's got somethin' on their mind.

Beth: But, I...

Emilio: Guys...

Mike: Beth, do you know anythin' 'bout these "harmonic destructor" things that seem to have brought this planet to its knees and our ears to their doom? :p

Beth: *shakes her head* No, I don't know anything about them! :P

Mike: Maybe you heard somethin' from somebody.

Beth: No, I haven't!

Emilio: Mike...

(Peter groans.)

Mike: Well, someone is doin' SOMETHIN' on this planet, other than drvin' way beyond the speed limit! :p

*Micky sighs.* :P

Peter: Beth... (he gets up and goes to her with a smile) You can tell us. If it's something bad, we won't hurt you. And if it's nothing...well, I'm not seeing auras quite right at the moment, anyway. :)

Beth: Well, I...

Peter: Come on, you can tell us. Maybe we can help you. :)

(Mike just crosses his arms and looks grumpy. :p)

(As Peter once again goes to touch Beth's shoulder, Emilio hears a loud knock at the door.)

Mike: What in the?

Emilio: Now who could that be? *opens the door*

(Men in glitter-spangled unforms like a cross between "Star Trek" and the 30's "Flash Gordon" serials storm in, carrying strange gun and sword-like objects. A man in a fancier uniform follows them; he has a very soft, round baby face and no hair.)

Man: Emilio Dakpludnick, you are under arrest for leaving the planet without a licence, harboring music-makers, and parking your spaceship in a no-parking field.

Emilio: WHAT?! :-O

Micky: Oh, come ON! :P

Mike: What in the HELL are you guys supposed 'ta be?

Man: Quiet, insolent foreign brat! Watch how you speak to Squadron Leader Omega Omaheddon! X(

Mike: You try arrestin' any of us, and you'll hear just how insolent I can be. X(

Peter: (Groans, holding onto Beth's shoulder) Michael...oooohhhh...

Micky: And he can get pretty insolent, whatever that means. :-/ ;)

Omaheddon: ENOUGH! You're coming with us! X(

Mike: Just try it, asshole! (He concentrates, trying to make his sword appear...but instead, a dark blue light surrounds Omaheddon. When it subsides, he's now naked except for a pair of skin-tight silver boxers.)

Peter: (Blushes) Oh, my... :">

Mike: Um, that's a little more than I wanted to see of you. :p ;)

*Micky doubles over laughing.*

Davy: Exhibitionist, mate? ;)

Omaheaddon: (Grabs a pillow and covers himself as best he can as he screams) GET THEM, YOU DOLTS! GET THEM ALL! X( :">

("Your Auntie Grizela" begins as the men go after the Monkees and the two robots.)

(Mike jumps out a window and onto a small platform. A squadron member follows him. Looking around frantically, Mike pulls a lever next to the platform. The platform moves, and the two men chase each other as they run in place.)

(Peter runs into the bedroom. He pushes a button and jumps into the bed that comes out. He then pushes the button again, and the bed goes back into the wall as two squadron members run in, looking for him.)

*Micky and Davy are cornered against a wall. Micky spots buttons and pushes them. Food shoots out of the wall from little doors. Davy joins in to pelt a couple of squandron members.*

(Mike and the soldier are still chasing each other on the machine.)

(The bed cautiously goes down. Peter pushes the button again, letting it go back up. He rubs his head, going to the bathroom to look for more aspirin. A squadron member steps in front of the medicine cabinet. Peter takes the man's arm and pulls him "open" like a door. As he checks the medicine cabinet, the squadron member finally hits him over the head with his weapon. Peter collapses in his arms.)

(Mike and the squadron member are STILL chasing each other. Mike is clearly beginning to sweat. :p)

*Emilio and Beth peek out of a closet. A squadron member pulls some wires on Emilio, then does the same to Beth.* >:) ;)

(Mike sees one of the squadron members carry the unconcious Peter out to a small, sleek-looking space ship. He tries to get over to them, but neither he nor the squadron member can get off the running machine.)

*Micky and Davy appear by the running machine. Davy leans over the lever, while Micky grabs hold of Mike. Davy throws the lever and Micky keeps Mike from going flying. The squadron member isn't so lucky and goes flying back into the room, where he slams into a wall, leaving an imprint, and slumps to the ground unconscious.*

Omaheddon: (He comes out of the bedroom wearing a robe as the music ends) Did you capture the robots and the aliens?

Squadron Member 1: We could only find one, sir, the yellow-haired one.

Omaheddon: He may be enough. I'm sure the Supreme Leader would love to get some information out of that little gold foreigner. What about the robots?

Squadron Member: Got him, too.

Omaheddon: Good, good. We'll leave people here to guard the premises in case the others return. Come along. (The men all leave...except for the three who remain to guard the doors of the house. They don't see Mike, Micky, and Davy peering in the windows.)

Mike: Guys, they got Pete. I saw them carry him on the ship.

Micky: *groans* Oh great. :P

Davy: And I 'aven't seen Emilio. Bet they got 'im, too. :P

Mike: And Beth. Damn it, there's GOT to be somethin' we can do to save them!