Davy: Let's finish this story and bring down Shelia and her men! Everyone ready?
(Mike roars. X( )
Micky: You better believe it! X-(
Peter: (Gulps and steps back from Mike) I'm ready... :o
(Roars, cheers, and burps from the crowd.)
(We begin backstage as the boys are finishing their drinking number. Emma, Lauren, Daphne, and the three girls are surrounded by pirates. Pirates also hold the twins.)
Evil Pirate 1: Hey, sir...um, ma'am, what do you wanna do with these kids?
Evil Pirate 2: Yeah, we can't hold them all day!
Lauren: *narrows her eyes* Better not doing anything with them! X-(
Emma: (Glares) They're only kids, Shelia. X(
Shelia: Yes, but kids can also be interfering. :P
Evil Pirate 2: Can't we just dump them somewhere?
Shelia: We can lock them in one of the dressing rooms.
(At this point, two pirates emerge with a battered figure. They throw him onto the ground. He pulls his head into the light...to reveal a battered Gary Shelton.)
Evil Pirate 3: What about this guy? We found him poking around in the back.
Gary: (Gasps) I'm the DIRECTOR! Of COURSE I was poking around in the back! That's my JOB!
Emma: Shelia, let him go. He has nothing to do with any of this.
Shelia: *smirks* Hmm. Lock him in another dressing room. That'll keep him out of my way.
Gary: But...who ARE you? You're not Albert King!
Shelia: How very astute of you. Who I am doesn't matter. Not to you. :P
Gary: Why are you destroying my show? We've all worked so hard on this!
Shelia: *slight frown* Who said it's being destroyed?
Gary: None of this is what I concieved or the Levinstons wrote!
Shelia: I'm just making it better. ;) >:)
Gary: But..but... (He struggles weakly, which gets him another backhand from one of his captors)
Shelia: But nothing. *to his captors* Lock him in a dressing room.
(One pirate clamps his hand over the helpless director's mouth. Both drag him away. The pirates holding the twins follow them.)
Emma: Shelia, have you gone CRAZY? This is a major musical! What are you going to do, lock up half the cast and crew?
Shelia: *shrugs* Why not? Could only help this rotten show. :P ;)
Emma: You know WE won't let you get away with this. (Struggles as hard as she can)
Daphne: When the boys get back out...
Girl 1: Are we missing something?
Girl 3: What's going ON here? :o
Shelia: They won't do anything that will cause you harm.
Lauren: *mutters* I'm gonna cause some major damage in a moment. X-(
Evil Pirate 4: (Holding Emma as hard as he can) Man, this chick wiggles!
Emma: And I'm gonna keep wiggling until you let me go, jackass! X(
Lauren: You get a finger anywhere near my mouth, pal, and you'll have tooth imprints on your hands for weeks to come. :P X-(
Daphne: If you touch either of them...
Emma: Damn you, Shelia! (Emma lunges for her, trying as hard as she can to pull free)
Evil Pirate 5: Maybe we ought to tie the chicks up or somethin'.
Evil Pirate 4: At least the ones who ain't goin' onstage. :p
Shelia: Good idea. ;)
(The two pirates push Emma and Lauren onto two crates and tie them together, then gag them.)
Daphne: You bastard! Let them go! X(
(Emma growls under her gag. X( )
*Lauren mutters something into her gag.* :P X-(
Shelia: *smirks* It's already so much quieter. ;)
Daphne: Shelia, you've gone MAD! (Nods at the girls and the chorus members who have gathered around the scene) These girls are innocent. They have nothing to do with any of this! And Lauren and Emma are MOTHERS! They have children they have to get back to! X(
Shelia: I know that. You say that like I'm supposed to care. :P ;)
Crewmember 1: Jane Turner needs to get back onstage... (eyes widen when he sees the girls)...holy cow! What's going ON? :o
Daphne: I'll go on.
Girl 2: But you don't know the music!
(Emma shakes her head.)
*Shelia smirks.*
*Lauren rolls her eyes.* X-(
Daphne: It's the most I can do. (She steps onstage as the crowd make their way into the dressing rooms.)
(Daphne hops onto her bed as one set of curtains opens. She sings "Time and Time Again," then goes into a dance. Shelia, as "The Scar," walks onstage as she finishes.)
Shelia: *strides past the bed, slowing as she goes by* Remember to do what you're told, or everyone, including your beloved Lord of the Manor, will suffer. *continues past the bed*
Daphne: (Looks up in anger) How dare you threaten my dear Da...Captain Powers that way! I ought to have the Govenor lock you in the highest tower! X(
Shelia: How dare I? I can threaten whomever I wish. ;)
Daphne: (Growls) You arrogant...(kicks Shelia in the rear)...pig of a pirate! That's what I think of you! I'll never be your slave...or let you enslave my Davy...um, Captain David Powers! X( ;)
(There's a nervous chuckle from the crowd.)
Shelia: How dare you! :P
Daphne: You can do whatever you want to me! You know I'll fight you as much as I can! X(
Shelia: And I'll do what I want to you until I GET what I want! :P >:)
Daphne: I hate you! I'll never be yours! (Leans in for another kick)
Shelia: *mutters with a sneer* I'm not exactly fond of you, either. *out loud; moves away from the kick* Now, why would you say that? I only want what's best for you. ;)
Daphne: Hardly! (As Shelia grabs her hand) Let me go, you wi...swine! X(
(She struggles and hits Shelia on the shoulders.)
Shelia: *winces; growls; mutters* Watch it. :P *out loud* Is that any way to treat someone who's trying to look out for you?
Daphne: Trying to ENSLAVE me is more like it! You want me to be like all the others in your life! You use everyone you get your hands on! You're nothing but a cold-blooded bastard! X(
Shelia: *slight smirk* You're aren't seeing things from my point of view. I could give you anything and everything you've ever wanted, and you know that!
Daphne: And destroy my life in the process! No thank you! X( :p
Shelia: Quite the contrary. Your life would be better. Just imagine having all you've ever wanted. ;)
Daphne: And end up a slave to YOU! I want to live a normal life, with David by my side!
Shelia: You'd never want for anything ever again.
Daphne: The struggle and the work are part of life!
Shelia: You'd rather work for everything than have it given to you? *makes a face* :-/
Daphne: (Tries to pull away) Yes!
Shelia: You lie! :P
Daphne: No! I don't want to be just something you use to steal money and...other valuables...from innocent people! I want no part of it, and neither does David or any of the others! X(
Shelia: *fumes* You're making the wrong decision. :P
Daphne: (Quiet but firm hiss) No, I'm not. X(
Shelia: We'll see about that.
(The curtain opens; the chorus starts to come onstage as the Govenor's ball set is revealed.)
Shelia: For now, we still have the Governor's Ball to go to.
Daphne: I'd never go with you! X(
Shelia: *grabs for Daphne's hand* Yes, you will!
Daphne: No! (Struggles)
Shelia: Come along! *pulls at her*
(Shelia drags her into the chorus as the orchestra plays a dainty minuet, which is drowned out by "Looking For the Good Times. Davy and Micky come onstage with the Cockney pirate, the Westminster Abbies, Tilly, an unsteady Nyles, and Fern in her ill-fitting gown. Davy, Nyles, and Micky both wear heavilly ruffled Colonial-style suits. The Abbies and Tilly wear frilly gowns and wigs.)
Davy: (Whispers to Micky) Ok, Mick, you know what to do. 'Elp Fern, Tilly, and and the Abbies distract the crowd while I talk to Daphne, Mike and the Four Martians rescue Em and Lauren, and the reserves wait for my signal. Got it?
Micky: *nods; whispers* Got it.
(Davy and the others join "Looking for the Good Times." Fern and the Cockney pirate try to impress with their loose dancing, then go to the buffet. One male chorus member reaches out to grope Kimberly; she knocks him out with a karate chop. ;) )
(Maxine jumps happily into one large male chorus member's arms.)
Maxine: Hey, hot stuff, what's your sign? ;) :X
*Micky walks up to a suit of armor and has a conversation with it.* ;)
(Jenny produces a pallet and starts panting the walls and the guests psychadelic colors. ;) )
*Nyles takes a seat at the "bar" and calls for pint after pint.*
(Kimberly joins him and asks for "what he's having." ;) )
(Maxine starts a conga line. ;) )
*Micky leaves the stage and returns with a set of bongos to help Maxine with her conga line.* ;)
(Davy leaves the conga line as the song gradually ends up in the background. He pulls Daphne aside.)
Davy: Daph...Lady Abigail! Thank goodness you're all right! (Embraces her quickly)
Daphne: I've missed you too, Davy...David.
*The conga line dances across the forestage.* ;)
Davy: (As Daphne cuddles against him) There's no time for that now, luv. We've got to stop the treachery of the Scah and the Govenor!
Daphne: But, how?
Davy: My men...people and I are going to steal every cent in the Govenor's vaults! I've recieved reports that the King himself is going to visit tonight! When he arrives, we'll expose the Govenor as a traitor and the Scah as a villian!
Daphne: And I'll be right beside you, my love. (Snuggles into his chest) :X
Davy: No, Daph..Abby. It's too dangerous.
Daphne: What does danger matter if I can't be with you?
Davy: Your ladyship...
Daphne: I'd brave a whole fleet of mercenaries and corrupt Govenors to stay by your side and right the wrongs I've seen!
*The conga line is now on its third lap.* ;)
Davy: God, luv, what did I do to deserve someone as sweet and loyal as you?
Daphne: It must have been wonderful. ;)
*The bongos suddenly stop. Micky climbs up on a chair.*
Micky: *yells* Open bar!!! :D ;)
(That brings out everyone in a five-mile-radius...including crew members, technicians, and stagehands. They drop out of the celing and pop out of trap doors, appear from behind the curtain, and jump down from parts of the set. ;) )
Davy: (He and Daphne laugh) Good ol' Seaman Dolenz. If anyone can distract an entire pirate crew, it's 'im. ;)
Daphne: THAT'S for sure! ;)
Micky: *crawls out from underneath the sea of people, towards Davy and Daphne* Thought I'd never get out of there alive! :P
Davy: Wot 'ave I told you, Seaman Dolenz? Promise people free beer, and they'll go ANYWHERE. ;)
Micky: *stands* Yeah, you told me. ;)
Davy: (Holds Daphne) My love...you really should go back with the women...
Daphne: (Touches his lips) No, David. I'm not leaving you or Seaman Dolenz. I love you, and I want to help you.
Davy: Lady, no. You have to go back. (He starts to sing "Dream World," but she answers him with the next chorus, and it becomes a duet that ends with them kissing while Micky makes faces. ;) :X :p )
Daphne: (As she breaks the kiss) Well, am I leaving? ;)
Davy: Uhhhhhh.... :X
Daphne: (Embraces Davy) I never want to let go of you again, Captain.
(Davy's too stunned from Daphne's kiss to respond. He just grins. ;) :X )
*Shelia--aka "The Scar"--enters."* ;) :P
Daphne: (Gasps; Davy pulls her closer to him) She...Scah!
Davy: (Narrows his eyes) Get outta 'ere. X(
Shelia: And miss out on what's left of this party? I don't think so. ;)
Davy: You're not invited. :p
Daphne: I don't remember declaring this open house.
Shelia: Since when do I need an invitation? :P
Davy: (Draws his familiar rapier - the one that belonged to his ancestor Lord David) Since now. X(
*Micky has disappeared to...somewhere.* ;)
Shelia: That's an interesting reason. :P
Daphne: This is supposed to be a PRIVATE conversation! X( :p
(More pirates dressed in black ruffles join Shelia behind her.)
Shelia: Not anymore.
Evil Pirate 5: What do you want to do with them, Mister...um, Miss Scar, ma'am?
(Davy pushes Daphne behind him as the pirates surround them.)
Davy: I can take all of you on at once! X(
Shelia: *smirks* Do as he says. All of you at once! Tie them up!
(Two pirates grab Davy and take his rapier. Two more take hold of Daphne. Davy's hands are bound behind him. More pirates pull the other three Abbies, Fern, Tilly, and the remaining pirates over to Shelia, who crosses to the center stage. It takes four pirates to subdue Kimberly, who kicks and screams until one knocks her legs out from under her and another gags her.)
Maxine: (Gasps and lunges; a pirate takes her arms) Kim! :o
Fern: (Struggles herself) Let us go!
Cockney Pirate: You bloody cowahd!
Shelia: *points the rapier at Davy's chest* Looks like I've finally found the person who stole the townspeople's money. ;) >:)
Davy: No!
Daphne: (Struggles) You bastard!
(The people in the chorus gasp and glare at Davy.)
Shelia: That's right.
Govenor: (Joins Shelia) It's that blasted pirate Captain David Powers! (smirks) He's been stealing from these waters for years now!
Davy: But I 'aven't...
Shelia: Don't deny it!
Daphne: They're LYING! X(
Govenor: If you tell us what you've done with the bullion from the "Europa," you and your men may just be able to escape execution. What do you say to that, my boy?
(Davy's answer is to spit in Shelia's face.)
Shelia: Wrong answer. X-(
(Two of the pirates force Davy onto his knees. As Shelia presses her blade closer to Davy's neck....)
(The camera cuts backstage. Three pirates guard Emma and Lauren, who are still tied together and gagged. Four guard the doors to the dressing rooms where Gary Shelton and the Dolenz twins are imprisoned.)
(A group of shadows are seen inching along in the darkness.)
Evil Pirate 1: Hey, Marty, what do you want to do?
Evil Pirate 2: I dunno, Archie. What do YOU wanna do?
(Suddenly, sandbags fall on the heads of both men. ;) )
Mike: (Coming out of the shadows) Hey, where did they come from?
John: Heaven?
Chris: They're too heavy for pennies! :o
Micky: *leans over the side and waves* Hey, guys! I get 'em? ;)
Mike: (Grins) Micky!
Marcus: Yeah, you got 'em! :D
Danny: How'd you get up there, man?
Micky: *grins widely* All right! *shakes his head* Don't ask. I'm coming down. *disappears back over the side. Moments later, Micky reappears on a ladder attached to the wall, but ends up falling off about 10 feet from the floor. He lands with a *thud* and grins sheepishly, then winces.* :P
Mike: (Shakes his head and helps Micky to his feet) You ok?
John: Graceful there, Mick. ;)
Micky: Fine. I think there's a rung missing, though. :"> :P
Danny: Always knew you were hard-headed, but now we know you're hard-assed, too. ;)
(John smacks Chris. :p )
Micky: Thanks a lot, man. :P
(The girls call for them behind their gags.)
Mike: Oh, man. Let's get the girls outta this, before more of Shelia's boys decide to join the party.
Micky: Geez, yeah! :P
*The guys untie them.*
Lauren: *swats Micky* Nice fall. ;) :P
Emma: Took you guys long enough!
Mike: Where's the twins?
Chris: They didn't hurt those poor kids, did they? :o :(
Lauren: They're in one of the dressing rooms. And they'd BETTER be okay... X-(
Micky: Or else. X-(
Mike: (Nods) Come on. We're gonna get them out. The Four Martians will stay with you while the rest of us go onstage to help Davy.
John: (Bows deeply) We're honored to be bodyguards to such an attractive and charming brood.
Chris: Yeah, the kids are cute! :)
Lauren: *grins* Thanks. ;)
Marcus: They didn't get that from their dad. ;)
Micky: Hey!? :P
(Mike and Emma snort. ;) )
*Micky glares at them.* :P
*Lauren's still grinning.* ;)
(The group make their way down the hall. Two guards are in front of the ladies' dressing room...and two more guard the one next to it.)
Mike: (Pulls everyone into a corner) Ok, Micky and Marcus will take the ones in front of the first dressing room. John and I will take the second ones. Lauren and Chris will go in and get the twins. Emma and Dan will get whoever is being held in the second dressing room. There's gotta be someone in there, if they're guarding that one, too.
Emma: (Eyes widen) Gary Shelton!
Mike: The director?
Lauren: Yeah!
Emma: (Nods) Shelia's boys found him and knocked him around. She had them stick him in there. :p
John: Why would anyone knock around the DIRECTOR?
Mike: The show wasn't that bad. :p
Micky: *shakes his head* It's always the director's fault. :P
Mike: (Nods at the guards) Come on, guys.
(Mike and John grab the guards in front of the second dressing room. Mike throws a bag of "gold" into the men's bathroom. They run after it. John runs after them; sound of a scuffle, then flushing.)
John: That takes care of THEM. ;)
Mike: Very nice.
John: I thought so, too. ;)
Micky: *to Marcus* Seen "The Road To Morocco?" ;)
Marcus: (Nods) Gotta love Bing and Bob. ;)
Micky: Shall we? ;)
Marcus: Sure. (Grins) I get to be Bing. ;)
Micky: Oh, all right. :P ;)
(The two stand in front of the guards, doing "patty-cake." They hit the guards when they finish. ;) )
Micky: Very nice. ;)
Mike: (As Marcus and Micky drag the guards into the dark corner they'd just abandoned) Ok, Lauren, Chris, go retrieve the kiddies. ;)
Lauren: Gladly!
Emma: We'll get poor Gary Shelton. (Danny slams at the lock of the door with his sword until it gives. They go in and emerge with a scared, pale Gary Shelton.)
Gary: Thanks, kids. (Makes a face) I'd like it if someone could give me some answers here, though! What's going on? Who is that woman in the Scar's costume, and why is she re-writing my musical?
Emma: We'll tell you after Lauren and Chris come back out with the children.
Lauren: *comes back out holding Shelly; Chris follows with Little Mick* All right, we've got the kids back. I'm ready to kick some butt. :P X-( ;)
Emma: Are they ok?
Mike: (Leans over the kids) Did the bad lady hurt you guys?
Lauren: *Shelly's chewing her finger* They're fine. :)
Mike: (Ruffles Little Mick's hair) You kids weren't too scared, all alone in there, were you?
Emma: Of COURSE they were, Mike! They're only toddlers! :p
Little Mick: I don't like bad lady! *sticks his tongue out* :P
Mike: (Chuckles) Join the crowd, cowboy. No one likes the bad lady. :p ;)
Gary: Let's get out onstage and find out what that "bad lady" is doing with MY show! X(
Emma: I'm more worried about what she's doing with our friends. :p
Micky: No kidding. :P
Mike: (Sighs) Lauren, you and the Four Martians stay with the kids. The rest of us have got to get back to the stage.
Lauren: Right. *nods*
Chris: (Grins at Little Mick) We're gonna see your dad and uncles take down the bad lady. ;)
Gary: I'm coming, too.
Mike: Man, you're a mess.
Emma: Why don't you meet the police? Mr. Bennett should be coming around back with them any moment now.
Gary: The POLICE?
Mike: Mr. Shelton, the woman who took over your show is a known criminal.
Gary: Figures. :p
Micky: And, obviously, this isn't how you planned the show to turn out. :P
Gary: All I wanted was an elegant, old-fashioned adventure, not "Monty Python Meets Dark Shadows By Way Of Batman." :p
Micky: That isn't a bad title. ;)
Gary: That's not the show I wrote, though. That's not the music the Levinstons wrote. They're in the audience now; they'll be livid when they get their hands on me! X(
Mike: Go meet the cops, Mr. Shelton. Ask for Seargent Nielson and John Bennett. They'll be able to help get your show back.
Gary: (Frowns) What about you kids?
Mike: You'll see. ;)
Micky: We'll be just fine. ;)
Gary: I hope so, kids. (Sighs) I hope so.
(And we cut back to the tense scene onstage. Shelia still holds her sword to Davy's neck. The two pirates hold him down. Two more hold Daphne, who tries to lunge at Shelia. Four hold the gagged and bound Kimberly down.)
Davy: Scah, I'm not going to do what you want, and (eyes flare) I will NEVER be your slave! X(
Shelia: We'll see about that. ;) >:)
Daphne: No! (She pulls away and runs between Shelia and Davy) She...Scar, let him go! If I do what you want, will you let him and the others go?
Davy: Dap...Abby, you don't know what you're saying! :o
Shelia: I might consider it. ;)
Daphne: I'll...collect precious objects for you. Anything! Just as long as you don't hurt them. Just as long as you don't hurt HIM! :o :(
Shelia: *smirks* Excellent. ;) >:)
Davy: (Squirms in the grasps of the pirates) Daphne....
Evil Pirate 5: What do you want us to do with her, Scar?
Daphne: (Turns to Davy) David...I had to. I don't want you to be a slave. (She sings "I Wanna Be Free" in it's ballad version...and Davy gradually joins her. It ends with a kiss that the pirates break.)
Shelia: Enough. Bring her along.
(The pirates take hold of Daphne and pull her into the crowd with them.)
Davy: A...and me?
Maxine: Damn you, lady, lay off!
Shelia: And as for you, dear Captain...
Davy: (Gulps and nods at the girls) Ladies, now! Covah your eahs!
(The girls cover their ears as best as they can as Shelia aims her sword for his throat....and Davy lets loose with the highest-pitched note he can.)
*Shelia drops the sword to cover her ears.* :P
(Suddenly, three figures are seen sliding down the Govenor's palace set on knives. Those figures land semi-gracefully on the floor...and turn out to be Emma, Micky, and Mike. Mike has his broadsword. Micky swishes his knife. Emma brandishes a short, sharp sword.)
Mike: Ok, shotguns, reach for the sky!
Emma: And let Captain Powers and those fair maidens go!
Micky: Or prepare to be shishkabobbed! ;)
Emma: With pineapple! ;)
Shelia: *growls* Not again! :P
Mike: Oh yes, again, Devil Wo...Pirate! We're your worst nightmare, and we're back to haunt you. ;)
Emma: (Growls) To the end of your days! X(
Micky: Boo! ;)
Shelia: *lets out a frustrated growl; to her pirates* Get them!
(The pirates surround Mike, Emma, and Micky. Mike just grins.)
Mike: We'd love to stay and play with you boys, but we have some friends who REALLY wanna get to know ya'll better. (He lets loose with the loudest whistle he can manage. Suddenly, there are pirates and townspeople EVERYWHERE! Pirates emerge from the celing, from the holes made in the set, from under the stage, from the set itself, from either side of the stage. Peter and Valerie slide down a rope into center stage, followed by the Jolly Green Giants and the Angellettes.)
Lillian: What an entrance! ;)
Shelia: *makes a face* Why me? :P
Peter: Are we ok, Davy? Did we come in time? :)
Davy: In the nick of time, mate! #:-S
Evil Pirate 2: What are we gonna do now, Scar?
Shelia: Get them! X-(
(And we have our next romp to "Hold On Girl.")
Mike: (Over the music) Mick, you and Lauren help Davy! We'll hold off Shelia!
Micky: *nods* No problem! ;)
(Mike blocks Shelia from Davy as Daphne runs over to him.)
Mike: Oh no, you don't, (hisses) Devil Woman!
Peter: Mike, watch out! (Peter shoots his arrow through the rope on a sandbag; it breaks the rope and the sandbag comes crashing down on the head of the pirate who was about to knock Mike out)
Mike: Thanks, Pete! ;)
Peter: No problem!
Micky: *cuts through the rope on Davy’s wrists with his dagger and brushes him off* There. Much better. ;)
Davy: Thanks, mate. ;)
Micky: Anytime. ;)
Daphne: (Hugs Davy) Davy!
Davy: Luv... (they start kissing; Micky shields his eyes and moves back into the fray)
Micky: *as he rejoins the fight* La la la la... *punches out a pirate* I like that! ;)
(Tilly stands on a table in a colonial gown that looks a bit ridiculous with her short do and the sneakers that are clearly on under her dress. She throws all the fake food she can get her hands on at the pirates...and everyone ELSE who comes near. ;) )
(Lillian crooks her finger and sashays over to the edge of the stage...then bodychecks an very aroused pirate off the stage. ;) )
(Davy ducks under legs.)
(Maxine, Jenny, and Daphne pry the men off of Kimberly. She thanks her roommates, then goes into martial arts stance and kicks a few pirates into submission.)
*Micky ducks a punch from a pirate, then points up. The pirate looks up and gets a fist connected with his jaw.* ;)
(Joe, Cory, and Bobby pick up Nyles and use him as a battering ram to make their way through the crowd. They hold him up in front of a group of particuarlly nasty pirates. His very, very long burp knocks them all out. ;) )
*Another pirate with a sword lunges at Micky. Micky side steps and the pirate goes past him, earning a kick on the butt as he passes.*
(The romp is getting so wild, it's spilling out into the backstage area. The Govenor's ball backdrop falls onto a group of pirates who were attacking Emma, Peter, and Valerie. Audrey and Winnie jump down from the staircase set and shake hands, grinning. ;) )
(Emma is dueling with a pirate; she snaps his eyepatch and ducks away as he's holding his eye. ;) )
*Micky returns from off stage with a full pint in hand. He takes a sip as a pirate comes up to him. He holds up an index finger, then hands the pint to the pirate. As soon as it's in the pirate's hand, Micky kicks him in the gut. Some of the ale spills out, but Micky grabs it while it's still half full. He grins and takes another drink.* ;)
(Davy is dueling with another pirate. He slices his belt; his pants fall down. Daphne throws a cloth over him, and she and Davy fall down onto him. When all three emerge, Davy and Daphne are triumphantly running off with his pants, and he's running offstage in his boxers. ;) )
(Emma is dueling with a pirate. She puts out her hands, signaling for him to stop where he is. As he gives her an annoyed look, she closes her eyes. There's a slight blue light, and he disappears in a trap door.)
*Micky is being chased by another pirate. He runs up and around the back, then reaches a ledge. A plank appears in a muted blue light. Micky waits for the pirate and side steps when he runs up. The pirate ends runs off the plank and off stage.* ;)
(Three pirates grab at Lauren and the twins, who are still backstage. Suddenly, all three jump, eyes wide, and run offstage, their pants pulled down. The Four Martians appear behind them, grinning, yelling "Wedgies!" and giving each other high-fives. ;) )
*Lauren grins as the twins start yelling "Wedgies!"* ;) :P
(Cut back to the stage. Mike and Shelia are dueling as the music runs down.)
Mike: Damn you, Shelia, why can't you leave us alone?
Shelia: Why can't you just give in? :P
Mike: Maybe 'cause we wanna live like normal human bein's, Shelia, not some collector and bed toys for YOUR warped desires! X(
Shelia: I don't see what's so wrong with that. I could give all of you so much.
Mike: We wanna give it to ourselves, Shelia. Besides, what you want us to do is just plain WRONG. X( :p
Shelia: *narrows her eyes* You'd pass up everything you could ever want, just because you think what I want is wrong? :P >:)
Mike: Because we KNOW that what you want is wrong. (Gets in her face, their swords crossed) And because we'd rather get what we want ourselves, not have some spoiled devil brat do it for us. :p X(
Shelia: We'll see. *shoves Mike away, then lunges and slashes at him with her sword* >:)
(Mike staggers back, the sword falling from his hands. He puts his hand over his now-bleeding arm, his eyes furious.)
Mike: (Growls) Damn you, Shelia! X(
(Emma starts over to him, but two of the pirates take hold of her.)
Emma: Mike! Oh, god! :o
Shelia: *smirks* You should really be more careful. :P
Davy: Damn you, Shelia! He doesn't LIKE you! (Smirks) For that matter, I don't, either. Why don't you try to enslave some guy who actually wants to be in your bed?
Shelia: What's the fun in that? :P ;)
Davy: It’s a lot less 'armful on some of us. (He holds out his retrieved rapier) Let's 'ave it out, She...Scah. Me and you. I'll finish wot Seaman Nesmith stahted.
Mike: Davy...
Davy: (Grins at Mike) This is wot friends do for each other, Mike. They help each othah out when one is in a jam. :) ;)
Shelia: *holds out her sword* How touching. :P
Davy: Me and you, Scah. This is for Seaman Dolenz, Lady Abigail, the townspeople...and me friends. (Fencing stance) Engarde, you blaggard! (Grins at the camera) I've always wanted to say that! ;)
Shelia: Let's hope you swing a sword as well as you talk. :P
Mike: Davy! (Shelia nods at her pirates. One of takes his good arm and holds a knife to his neck; another does the same to Daphne)
Emma: NO! Mike! (She struggles)
Davy: (Growls) More insurance?
Shelia: Just to make sure this is a fair duel. ;) >:)
Davy: Nothin's evah faih when it comes to you, Devil Pirate! (He circles her)
Shelia: *smirks* Do you want to duel or have a talking trash contest? :P
Davy: All you care about is collectin' precious objects! You're nothin' but a stah collectah! (Smirks) And you're a pretty sorry sight in bed. ;)
Shelia: *growls* A star collector? I'll show you a star collector! :P
(Shelia lunges for Davy as "Star Collector" begins. They duel all around the set, on the staircases, through the parting crowds. Davy finally jumps down, and they duel in the orchestra pit. They duel off to the sides of the "screen." Suddenly, as Shelia takes a particuarlly fierce lunge, there's a scream. Davy ducks out of the way as a handless cameraman falls out of sight and off his camera. ;) )
Davy: Umm...(points his sword at Shelia) She did it!
Shelia: Did not! :P
Davy: Did too! (Sticks his tongue out at her) So there! :p
Winnie: (Onstage) Oh, THAT'S mature. :p
Shelia: Oh, yeah? *sticks out her tongue* Did NOT! :P
*Micky just shakes his head and works on his next pint.* ;)
Davy: Did too! (He lunges for her, and they start dueling again. They take their duel into the audience, jumping on the backs of chairs and on empty chairs, finally ending up back onstage.)
(As the song ends, Davy finally knocks Shelia’s sword out of her hand and points his blade at her neck.)
Davy: Did TOO, Devil Wo...Pirate! ;) :D
Shelia: *eyes narrow* Finish me off, Captain. *pauses* And did NOT! :P ;)
Davy: No. I'm not like that. (Looks up at the actor who plays the king, who sits with Micky and Nyles, quaffing pints of "ale.") Your highness, this is the pirate "The Scar," also known as Vincent Rathington, a mercenary and scoundrel who has been helping the Govenor take illegal taxes from these good people! (Indicates the townspeople and pirates in the crowd.)
King: (Hiccups) They have? That's not very nice. I think I'll arrest them. (Goes to Shelia, swaying) Madame, (hiccups) by orders of the King of England, you're under arrest, and so's all your boys. (Nearly sways into Shelia)
Joe: (To Micky) What the HELL did His Majesty have to drink?
*Shelia rolls her eyes.* :P
Micky: *grins stupidly* The same thing I did. :D ;)
Joe: Can I have some? ;) :D
Micky: Go for it. ;)
King: (Sways over Davy as the good pirates grab the bad ones and Emma and Kimberly take hold of Shelia) I think I'll pardon you. You seem like a nice boy. What's your name, boy?
Davy: Davy J...Captain David Powahs, at your command, sir.
King: That's nice. (Nods at Daphne) Abby, honey, have a good time. He's all yours. (Lets out a massive burp and falls on the floor, drunk.)
Daphne: Well, who am I to deny our monarch?
Chris: I thought he was a king!
Davy: Yeah, that too. ;)
Mike: (Holding his hand to his bleeding arm) Nice work, Dave. :)
Emma: You did great! :D
Peter: Davy, you were wonderful!
Valerie: Very impressive, Captain. :)
Micky: *holds up a newly filled pint* A toast to Dave! :D ;)
Joe: (Holds up another filled pint) Here here!
Mike: I think I'll go with that. (Grins and takes an empty pint) A toast to Captain David Powers, the greatest little pirate in all of the Carribean! :D
(There's "here heres!" all around the stage, except for from Shelia and her now-surrounded men. ;) )
Micky: Yeah! *nearly falls of his seat* ;)
Tilly: (Sobs) Oh, I just LOVE happy endings! :(( :)
Davy: (Takes Daphne's hand) Daph...
(Daphne just pulls him into a very deep kiss. :X)
Davy: Oh, luv, we were MADE for each other! :x
Micky: *giggles* Song cue! :D
(And their duet of "We Were Made for Each Other" gradually blends into a finale "Daydream Believer." Mike takes Emma with his one good arm and kisses her. Valerie pulls Peter into a kiss. Marcus grabs Tilly and knocks her off the table with his passion. ;) )
*Lauren goes over to Micky, the twins in tow. Micky grins stupidly at her, the DOES fall off his seat, out cold. Lauren rolls her eyes as Little Mick starts poking Daddy and Shelly tugs on Mommy's hand to be picked up.* ;)
(The curtain closes as "Daydream Believer" ends. Everyone but Shelia and her boys and the unconcious Micky and Nyles join hands and emerge for one final curtain call. Lauren and Emma even bring out the twins. ;) )
(As the curtain closes, there's more activity on the now-enclosed stage. Sergeant Nielson, Gary Shelton, Mr. Bennett, and the cops make their way to the group.)
Nielson: (Grins at Shelia) Well, well, well, what do we have here?
*Shelia just folds her arms over her chest.* :P
(That's when two more crewmembers emerge with a very angry and disheveled Mrs. Badderly.)
Daphne: (Points at Mrs. Badderly) Those two are the masterminds behind this, Sergeant! Shelia kidnapped me and Micky and she and Mrs. Rhetta Badderly plotted to harm Jane Turner and Darren Kowalski in order to get her daughter and Davy Jones their roles in the show!
Fern: (Frowns) Mother, is this true?
Mrs. Badderly: Fern, honey, I did it for you. I've always done it for you. I want you to have nothing but the best.
Fern: Mother, I HAVE a good part! Why do you always have to want more?
Mrs. Badderly: Because you're my little girl, and you deserve the best life has to offer.
Fern: (Shakes her head) Mother, I already have it.
Nielson: Could someone tell me EXACTLY what's going on?
Gary: And speaking of Jane, where is she?
Mike: Good question.
Davy: We're missin' Albert King, too, the real "Scah."
Lauren: Haven't seen either for a while.
Emma: (Glares at Shelia) Well?
Davy: You know wot we'll do to you if you don't talk, Shelia. ;) :p
Shelia: *sticks her tongue out* I don't take kindly to threats. :P ;)
Nielson: Maybe you'll take kindly to twenty years in a nice, quiet maximum security prison, Miss Saunders. We have two charges of aiding and abetting a criminal, one of espionage, one of medical malpractice, and I've lost count of how many kidnapping charges on your head. :p X(
*Shelia just smirks.* ;)
Officer 1: It'll be easier if you just tell us where they are, ma'am. :)
Shelia: (Sighs) Jane is under the stage, tied up in a closet. King is in the large prop room upstairs. You won't miss him. :P
Sergeant Nielson: (To his officers) Go get them. Make sure they're all right. (To Shelia) We're not letting you off the hook, Saunders. You're coming with us, and no disappearing acts this time. X(
Mike: Good. It's about freakin' time. (Emma nudges his good arm.)
*Shelia just makes a face.* :P
Mrs. Badderly: It's all her fault! It was her idea! She said she could help me!
Nielson: Sorry, ma'am, but if you were involved, we're going to have to book you, too.
Mrs. Badderly: What? (Turns to her daughter) Fern, dear...
Fern: (Pulls away) No, Mother. I'm not doing what you want.
Mrs. Badderly: But Fern, I'm your mother! I’m supposed to look out for you!
Fern: If you were really looking out for me, you'd let me live my own life and earn my own parts, not try to force them on me and others!
Mrs. Badderly: I'm just trying to help you.
Fern: Maybe I don't want your help anymore, Mother. Maybe I’m an adult who knows how to get her own parts.
(One officer emerges with Jane Turner. The other comes down with a tall man in his underwear. Jane's eyes are large and frightened; she indicates her throat.)
Mike: (Mutters) Oh, shit. (To the others; softly) I think Shelia muted them. :p
Lauren: *mutters* That figures. :P
Peter: (Whispers to Shelia; he's closest) Shelia, please give them their voices back! They can't stay like that! They're actors. They need to talk! (Indicates Shelia’s "crew") And make the bad pirates right again, too!
Gary: (Goes to Jane) Jane, are you ok? What happened to you? Where did you disappear to?
Shelia: *scowls; mutters* Fine. *concentrates; a muted black light faintly surrounds both of their throats and the evil pirates.* :P
(The "evil" pirates stumble and look at each other, dazed.)
Jane: (Gasps) Oh, thank GOD! (Points at Shelia) That...that...(snarls) WOMAN tricked me! She and (points at Mrs. Badderly) that woman led me to believe they could help me. They nearly KILLED me, and then SHE (indicates Shelia) assulted me under the stage and did something to my voice! X(
Albert King: I don’t know WHAT happened! One minute, I was in costume, the next, I was tied up in the prop room without my costume or the ability to speak. :p
Nielson: (Grins) Goody. We can add assault to that lovely laundry list of crimes you have, Saunders. ;)
*Shelia continues to scowl.* :P
Nielson: (Two officers slap handcuffs on Shelia; Nielson takes her arm) Come on, honey. We're going to have a nice, long talk at the precinct about many, MANY things. ;)
*Shelia glares at the group.* :P X-(
(Nielson finally leads the scowling Shelia away. Two more officers handcuff Mrs. Badderly and lead her away, too, only she's screaming at the top of her lungs that she didn't do it and it was all Shelia's fault.)
Davy: (Grins) We did it, guys. (Turns to everyone; the actors, the crew members, the rescuers, his friends, Gary Shelton) Shelia's FINALLY behind bahs where she belongs. :D
(Major cheers rock the backstage area. :D )
Lauren: It's about freakin' time. :D
Mike: Serves her damn right! :p
John: Well, what now?
Davy: Now...we go home. ;)
Gary: Not quite.
Lauren: Huh?
Gary: (Turns to Jane) Jane...are you ok?
Jane: (Nods) Yes, Gary, just tired.
Gary: I'd like to talk to you about your part tonight.
Jane: I was thinking the same thing. I want to cut some of my numbers. It's really too much for me, and this is more of an ensemble piece. (Sighs) And we've got to talk to the Levinstons about some of those god-awful romantic tunes! ;) :p
Gary: (Grins) Exactly what I was thinking.
Jane: (Goes to him) Are you ok? What happened? (Touches his cheek) Your face...
Gary: Got roughed up, that's all.
Jane: (Grins) You know, I could do wonders for your career. I know people here in LA who would love to have someone experienced in revue work on their variety programs. ;)
Gary: Really?
Jane: (Nods) Really. We'll completely re-do the show, from top to bottom. Maybe even put it on national television.(Turns to Davy) David...
Davy: (Shakes his head) You'll have to find anothah Captain Powahs, Miss Turnah. As of tonight, my days as a dashin' leadin' man are ovah. ;) (Daphne beams from behind him.)
Jane: But you're so talented!
Davy: Music and 'orses are my business, Miss Turnah, not swishin' swords around onstage. You'll find someone just as good when you recast...and more deservin' of a nice lady like you. :)
Jane: Is that how you feel?
Davy: (Looks behind him at the others, especially the unreadable Mike, and nods) Yes, Miss Turner. That's how I feel.
Gary: (Sighs) I guess we'll have to go back to square one, then. We'll be needing new sets, a new leading man...
Jane: I'll help you.
Gary: Why don't we help each other? (Grins shyly) Would you like to meet my family?
Jane: (Grins back, a bit weary) I'd love to, darling. (They walk offstage arm-and-arm)
Lauren: Isn't that sweet? ;)
Fern: (As they leave) Shame Gary's married. They're cute. ;)
Davy: Now Jane can 'elp someone's career, and Gary can get HIS career back on track. :)
(That's when someone else makes his way backstage. He's a tall man in his 30s, with curly chestnut hair, a fashionable suit, and dark glasses.)
Man: (Goes up to the Monkees and their families) Hey, you kids were great tonight. Really made something out of that show.
Davy: Thanks, man.
Mike: Who are you?
Emma: (Elbows Mike) Honey, don't be rude!
Lauren: It's a fair question...
Man: (Grins and shakes Mike's good hand) Name's Van Robertson. I'm the owner of the Pacifica Club in Los Angelas.
Mike: Nice to meet you. You've got a good place.
Van: Did you guys write the music? I know the majority of it wasn't listed in the programs, and it doesn't sound like the work of Nancy and Oscar Levinston.
Davy: Yeah, most of it, or our friends did. Why?
Van: (Grins) I LOVE your sound. All of you! It's so different, so...unique.
Mike: What do you want?
Van: I wanted some good west-coast bands to open my new nightclub in New York next month, the H2O. I saw all of you in the show and I thought you'd be perfect. :)
Peter: Really? :D
Lauren: Wow! :D
Van: I'd spread you all out over our first weekend in business. I'd love to have some unknown acts to attract crowds. Something new, daring.
Kimberly: All of us?
Joe: Awesome!
Lillian: Is the pay regular when we play regular?
Van: And free meals for the bands! ;)
Cory: I'm already there! :D
Lauren: Yeah! ;) :D
Fern: Wow! That's so cool!
Mike: Is this for real?
Van: If you're up to it, you can come down to the Pacifica Club tomorrow and we'll draw up the contracts. I'll even make sure there's lawyers and everything.
Mike: I'd like that. Every time we sign something, we get stiffed. :p
Maxine: Tell me about it. :p
Davy: Well, gang, what do you say?
Maxine: Ladies?
John: Martians?
Joe: Everyone else? ;)
Lauren: Yeah! :D
(Mike nods, still holding his arm)
(There's a large round of cheers from around the backstage area...and snores from Nyles. ;) )
*And Nyles's snores are outdone by Micky's.* ;)
Mike: We'll come down to the Pacifica Club tomorrow and have a look at those contracts, Mr. Robinson.
Van: (Shakes his good hand) That's great! I'll see you guys tomorrow! You won't regret this! (He heads out)
Maxine: Wow, we've got a job!
Joe: ALL of us!
Peter: (Grabs Mike's good hand and starts hopping up and down) Michael, we're going to New York! We're going to New York! :D
Mike: (Winces) When we draw up those contracts. :p
Emma: (Grins at Mike) We've got another announcement to make, too.
Mike: (Frowns) Huh?
Emma: You know, honey! THE announcement!
Mike: Oh, yeah. (Grins) As of next week, when the papers go through, we'll be the proud owners of 1334 Beechwood Avenue. ;) :D
Emma: We bought the Pad! :D
Lauren: All right! *claps* :D
Peter: That's wonderful! (Gently hugs Mike and Emma, being careful of Mike's arm)
Valerie: Good work, guys!
Mike: 'Course, now we'll have to start saving money to fix it...
Emma: We're working on that. :p
Lauren: And you know Micky's willing to be cheap labor. ;)
Davy: That's true. ;) (Smiles) It'll be all right, guys. You'll 'ave us (indicates the group) to 'elp you!
John: Yeah, man! We're here for you!
Tilly: We won't let the aliens get you!
Mike: (Grins; winces) That's nice to know, Til. ;)
Emma: (Sighs) But right now, we're going to get someone home to have his arm checked out. :p
Mike: Em, you're worryin' again. I'm fine.
Emma: That looks pretty bad, honey.
Mike: Em...
Davy: (Grins) Mike, just let her fuss over you. It's the Mothah Beah in 'er. ;)
Lauren: She likes doing that. ;)
Mike: (Goes to Davy) Dave...
Davy: (Shakes his head) Mike, it's my fault. I really was bein' a bloomin' idiot over this show. (Sighs) And all it did was end up causin' us trouble. :p
Mike: No, Dave, I was the idiot. I shouldn't have jumped on you.
Davy: (Puts out his hand) Why don't we call it a truce for now, Mike? ;)
(Mike nods and takes Davy's hand. Davy finally pulls him into a hug. :) )
Peter: Awwww! :)
Valerie: Now THAT'S what I like to see!
Lauren: That's so nice. :D
Peter: So you're a Monkee again, Davy?
Davy: Always. ;)
John: You know what, guys? I think this calls for a celebration. Why don't we get back in our regular threads and head out for some wine, women, and song? ;)
Davy: Wanna come too, Fern?
Fern: (Shakes her head) No. (Grins wickedly) Albert King gave me his phone number yesterday. I want to follow up on that. (Hugs Davy) It's been nice seeing you again, Dave. Maybe the show will make it to the East Coast when you're there!
Davy: Maybe, luv.
Fern: See you! (She waves and heads towards the dressing rooms)
Marcus: Let's go party!
Valerie: We'll do it at the Montgomery House. ;)
Peter: We have lots of room for everybody! :)
Lauren: Right! Let's haul out those who've already been partying. ;)
John: (Nods at Nyles) Man, he slept through almost the entire show!
Danny: Boy, is he gonna be mad! ;)
Marcus: Let's get him outta here, before he lets it all loose again. :p
(The Four Martians pick up the snoring Nyles and carry him towards the dressing room.)
Joe: Hey, Lauren, want some help with your buzzsawing hubby? ;)
Lauren: Please? :)
Cory: We'll wear earplugs. ;)
Bobby: He's probably three-fourths ale right now, anyway. ;)
Lauren: At least. ;)
Lillian: (Takes Little Mick's hand) And we'll help with the munchkins. :)
*Little Mick grins.* :D
Audrey: (Grins at Little Mick) You ready to have fun, shorty?
Little Mick: Yeah! :D
(The Jolly Green Giants walk out, carrying Micky, who continues to snore. Lauren and the Angellettes follow with the kids; Tilly follows after them.)
Kimberly: Hey, Davy, Daph, you guys coming?
Davy: We'll be a few minutes!
Maxine: Come on, girls. They need some time...alone. ;)
Jenny: REALLY alone. ;)
(The girls head for the dressing rooms. Davy turns to Daphne.)
Davy: Daph...
(Daphne's response is another deep kiss.)
Davy: (Grins as they come up) Mrrrrow!
Daphne: That good enough, Captain!
Davy: (Grins) Well, shiver me timbers and call me Errol Flynn! (Grabs her and pulls her down into a deeper kiss)
(As they go down, we see an old-fashioned poster for "The Sword and the Shadow" with drawings of pirates, damsels in distress, and grand ladies in ruffles.)
Daphne: (Voice-over as we see the poster) Ooooh! :D
Davy: (As we fade out) Arrrr.... ;)