Everyone ready to check out the lights?

Mike: Yeah.

Katie: I am!

Micky: You bet!

Robbie: Me too!

Little Mick: Me!

Shelly: I am.

Peter: Not me. There's a fair going on at school I'm helping out with.

(We open in front of Micky's lights-covered house. Mike sits in the front of the MonkeeMobile. Katie is next to him. Robbie's behind them in a child's seat. Mike's honking the horn.)

Katie: Can I honk the horn next, Papa?

Mike: No. Uncle Micky and the twins had better be out by then.

Ursula: Mike, you've pushed that thing three times already. The neighbors are beginning to stare.

Mike: Yeah, well, Micky said he'd be out here with the kids when I arrived...and he ain't here yet.

Ursula: Be patient, Mike.

*Micky finally comes out with Shelly on his back. Little Mick is alongside.*

Mike: (Leans out the window) What took you so long?

Micky: I had to give Shelly her piggy back ride.

Little Mick: I got mine already!

Katie: Can I have a piggy-back ride when we get home, Papa?

Robbie: Me too!

Mike: We'll see.

Ursula: (As they pull out) How are you tonight, Micky? Children?

Micky: We're great and ready to go.

Shelly: I love lights!

Little Mick: I can't wait to ride in Auntie Ursula!

Katie: So are we! I love looking at lights, and rides in Auntie Ursula are fun!

Mike: Yeah. (They pass by Micky's snob neighbors' house first. They still don't have a Christmas tree, but there are elegant-looking candles - real ones - in the windows of each front room.)

Katie: Those little lights look nice!

Mike: Wonder how Marty talked Elaine into even that?

Micky: Your guess is as good as mine.

Katie: Look! (Points to another house) That one has a big plastic snowman on the grass!

Mike: Looks tacky to me.

Ursula: (Grins as they pass a house with a car that's covered in lights) While I wouldn't want to be decked out like that, that car is rather handsome.

Micky: You sure you don't want that, Urse? I could do that REAL easy.

Ursula: No thank you, Micky. My lights are bright enough without more.

Mike: (Grins as they pass another house, this one with blue and green lights outlining the roof) I like the colors on that one. It's different.

Robbie: Candles! They gots candles! (He points to a house with what looks like a large brass candlebra in the front window)

Katie: Ooh, that candleholder's pretty!

Mike: Actually, I think that's a Hanukkah menorah. That's what Jewish people use for their winter holiday.

Shelly: It sure is pretty!

Mike: Yeah. I knew a couple of Jewish guys in the Army. They said Hanukkah ain't considered a big holiday - for them, that's Passover, their spring holiday - but they liked it anyway. I had potato latkas once at Forth Worth. Damn, they were really good. They're fried potato pancakes with onion and seasoning.

Katie: Fried potatoes? Oooh, that sounds yummy!

Ursula: (Sees a display where a plastic Santa is driving a 50s car with reindeer in the back instead of the sleigh) I rather like that one.

Mike: You would.

Micky: Well, I like that one, too.

Ursula: See, Mike? Micky and I agree on something.

Katie: Look at that one! It's purple! (She points to a house that has all purple and blue lights)

Mike: Don't seem right for Christmas.

Robbie: Pwetty!

Micky: Lauren would like that one.

(They pass by a small 50s-esque coupe. The two saleswomen and their boyfriends we saw at Stainton's are gawking at the lights. The guy in the red jacket leans out and yells "Lookit those lights!" before his girlfriend pulls him back in the car and they pass.)

Mike: What a bunch of morons.

Katie: I think they're funny!

Mike: Let's go down by the Pad next. Some of the beach houses look real nice this time of year.

Little Mick: Daddy's lights are the best.

Mike: Uh, yeah.

Katie: Santa sure won't have any problems finding our houses this year!

Robbie: No way!

Katie: Hey, where's your mommy? Mine's out working on a story.

Robbie: Mama's writin'!

Shelly: Wrapping presents.

Mike: No wonder you wanted to do this tonight. Lauren wanted you guys out from underfoot.

Micky: You could say that.

Mike: Wish we could have gotten the other guys to come, but Pete said somethin' 'bout volunteerin' for some shindig at the school where he works.

Micky: And Dave was taking his ladies out for the evening.

Katie: Lookit that one! (She points to another house lined elegantly with all-white lights, even down the driveway.)

Mike: Someday, they should make lights that can be draped from roofs like moss, insteada just hung there. It would look a lot better than just layin' them there.

Katie: Here's our house! (Points to the Pad...which is outlined with multi-colored lights, with lights on bushes and around the windows. It's not quite as elaborate as Micky's house, but it's a bit more than some of the other houses in the neighborhood.) It looks like my paint set!

Robbie: Lotsa colors!

Mike: (Mutters) Looks like a box of Crayolas threw up.

Katie: We had a good time puttin' the lights on, didn't we, guys?

Mike: YOU did.

Micky: I think it looks great!

Robbie: Our house is the pwettiest!

Mike: Here's Pete n' Val's house. (They drive by the Montgomery House next. It's outlined in all white lights, with nothing on the bushes, just the house.) Mick, did you n' Pete do the Montgomery House again this year? I had to talk to some guys about company stuff that day.

Micky: Yeah, we did. It was a compromise, but it came out really well.

Katie: (Turns to the twins) Did you help your papa do your lights this year, too?

Shelly: We sure did!

Little Mick: We helped with the bushes and the porch railing.

Mike: Ya did a good job too, cowpokes. Someday, maybe you two could join your daddy in his construction business.

Little Mick: Yeah!

Shelly: Maybe.

Katie: Let's go up to the mountains next! I'll bet the lights are real nice there!

Mike: I promised Mama we wouldn't go to far, cowgirl.

Micky: I know a route we can take that won't take us too far out.

Mike: You promise, man?

Micky: I promise.

Mike: Here, then. (He pulls onto a side street near the Montgomery House) Let's change seats. You drive. You know the routes.

Ursula: Are you sure this is a good idea?

Mike: He knows the area better than I do.

Micky: I know exactly where we can go. I've done the route dozens of times!

Ursula: (As the two switch seats) Well, all right.

Mike: (As he gets in the driver's side) Ok Mick, let's get movin'.

Micky: *Pulls out back onto the road* There's a turn just ahead a piece we'll take.

Katie: As long as the lights look good, I don't care where we go!

*Micky takes the turn, and we do see several houses that are well-lit.*

(An instrumental version of "Mistletoe and Holly" begins as the kids point out various houses. One has a huge Santa and reindeer right in the front lawn. Some kids are actually playing in the sleigh.)

(Shelly points out a house done all with blue lights, with lots of plastic snowmen and Frostys surrounding the yard. As Mike points out, that's the closest they're going to get to a White Christmas in Southern California.)

*Micky drives by the houses slowly, so everyone can get a good look.*

(Mike points out a house with a giant plastic Santa dressed as a miner and a cowboy boot outlined on the roof in red lights.)

(Katie points to a house with lots of blue and white lights and another menorah in the window, this one larger. Their Hanukkah lights are pretty!)

(Robbie grins at a house with a real working mini-train in their yard. The train holds a plastic Santa, Mrs. Claus, and reindeer, and even seems to be going around on a little track.)

(Mike rolls his eyes as they pass a house that looks as if it's completely wrapped in lights from roof to bushes. There's lights wrapped around the tree in the front yard, too, and lots of lawn decorations - a plastic Santa train, a card advertising a local radio station, even a two-foot working Ferris wheel with Santa and his reindeer going for a ride. The lights even flash on and off, and they're multi-colored. Talk about overdoing it.)

(Katie points one house out to Little Mick - it has a plastic Santa riding a ride-on mini dump truck. Santa's dressed as a construction worker building an igloo.)

*Little Mick grins. He likes that house's decorations.*

(Mike points out a house with elegant southwestern-style decorations - soft red and white lights, a wreath made from local vines and flowers, and strings of dried fruit and grain strung on the trees for the birds and animals.)

*Micky takes another turn, finding more decorated houses.*

(Mike points out a house that's decorated all with natural decorations - local vines and greenery, lights that use less electricity, sprays of local flowers, a wreath made of local vines.)

The car winds further into the hills, and the houses become larger. Mike points out some of the huge mansions covered with white and multi-colored lights.)

Mike: (As the song ends) Hey Mick...do you know where we are?

Katie: I don't recognize anythin'.

Micky: I think...I took a wrong turn. I usually come through here in the daylight.

Ursula: Oh dear. Don't tell me we're lost.

Katie: We're lost?

Micky: I didn't say that.

Ursula: Then where are we, Micky?

Micky: Well, we're near the edge of town...

Mike: That ain't gonna be a help. All the streets look alike up here!

Robbie: Wanna go home!

Katie: (She pats her brother) We're gonna be ok, Rob. Unca Micky knows where he's going. He's always lived here!

Mike: (Mutters) I hope he knows where he's goin'.

Micky: I'm just having issues because it's dark...

Ursula: Micky, have you ever thought of programming road maps into my database? Like a computer? I could help you out when you're in this area.

Micky: I think I'm gonna have to. I wish I could tell exactly where we are. I need a left turn and hope it takes us back to the main road.

Mike: You sure it's a left turn?

Ursula: Mike, Micky knows the area better than you. Just let him do it.

Micky: I'm positive.

Mike: I think I have a map somewhere in the glove compartment, if you need it.

Micky: No, I just need a left turn!

Ursula: They don't just pop out of nowhere, Micky!

Katie: Hey, how about this one? (Points to a turn in the road)

Micky: We'll have to try it.

Ursula: (As the car drives further down the mountains) Well, at least we seem to be getting closer to town.

Mike: Hey, look at that one! (He points out a log cabin decorated with real ivy and tree branches and lovely multi-colored lights)

Shelly: That's pretty!

Katie: I like that one, too! It looks like a Lincoln Logs house!

Mike: Looks like what you kids build when you play Gunsmoke.

Ursula: Anything look familiar, Micky?

Micky: A little. I think following this will take us back to the main road again.

Mike: (Sees Al pass by on the road with his girlfriend on the back of his motorcycle) Hey, there's Al again.

Katie: Wow, look at his motorcycle!

Robbie: Nice bike!

Ursula: They've certainly been out and about a lot recently, haven't they?

Micky: Yeah, they have.

Katie: They must really like each other! Do you think they'll kiss?

Mike: Probably a lot.

Micky: More than likely.

Robbie: (As we hear the sound of another cycle) Bike again!

Katie: Hey, he looks like Mr. Al! (Points to Brian, who is riding on the back of a motorcycle behind his blond girlfriend, who wears a white jumpsuit. Brian has his arm in a cast and a sling.)

Mike: Shi...darn. Looks like that spill he took at the parade hurt more than his pride.

Micky: *Winces* That really stinks.

Robbie: Ouchie?

Mike: Big ouchie. Looks like he broke his arm.

Katie: That's not fun!

Mike: (Flexes his bad hand and winces) No, it ain't, cowgirl.

Robbie: We home yet?

Mike: I think we're gettin' closer.

Micky: Yeah, we're on our way.

Katie: (Points to one large building) There's my school!

Mike: The twins' school, too.

Katie: I love school! It's fun! Ms. Ross is so nice, and I love learning letters and making clay pancakes for Mama!

Mike: How 'bout you kids? You twins like school?

Shelly: Yeah!

Little Mick: I like it.

Micky: *Quietly to Mike* Mick doesn't really seem to like it even though he does really well.

Mike: (Quietly) Don't like his teacher, or the kids he's with?

Micky: He likes them all just fine. He just seems to get bored and easily distracted.

Mike: Hmm. I had the same problem in school, so I really don't know what to say for him there.

Ursula: (As they turn onto Main Street) I believe we're back in Malibu Beach, everyone.

Mike: Why don't we talk kid problems over some peppermint cheesecake and hot cocoa at Millie's?

Katie: Let's go see Nana Millie! She has the best Candy Cane Cookies!

Robbie: Nana!

Micky: You two rugrats ready for hot chocolate and marshmallows?

*The twins both cheer.*

Ursula: I could use a quart of oil at the gas station down the street myself.

Micky: I think we can take care of that for you, Urse.

Ursula: Thank you. They're good to me there, and many of the regular cars are very sweet.

Mike: (Points to Millie's, which is lined with multi-colored lights that almost match her sign) There's Mil's. Did you help her with her lights, too?

Micky: A little bit. She's quite the whiz with lights herself.

Mike: Damn. Well, let's go get some cheesecake before the teenagers do.

Katie: Ok!

Robbie: Yum!

Ursula: And I'll await my oil.

(Micky pulls into Millie's parking lot as we fade out on the group and the lights on Millie's windows...and the lights in the sky as well.)