Everyone ready to finish this year's Christmas stories?

Mike: Yeah, I am.

Peter: I'm so full...

Micky: Ready.

Davy: I'm ready for a nap.

(We open in the Pad. The boys are all sprawled out in the living room, drinks in hand. Peter strums his banjo.)

Bob: Hey, guys. Merry Christmas.

Peter: Merry Christmas, guys.

Bert: So, how did dinner go after Little Mick doused your neighbors?

Mike: Quickly. We were almost done by then anyway.

Micky: He truly felt really bad about that.

Mike: Elaine and Martin just fussed and left. We did get dessert and coffee, but it was kind of over by then.

Bert: How did Uncle Eugene and Aunt Mae talk their way into dinner?

Peter: They must have needed somewhere to go.

Micky: It's like I told Mike. It's extremely hard to turn down a couple where one can't hear worth a darn and the other simply doesn't care.

Bert: Bet you're happy they're not spending the whole week with you.

Micky: Incredibly.

Mike: (Shakes his head) We never got to heavily into the relatives thing. Half of us don't have relatives anywhere near here, and the other half ain't speakin' to theirs. Mick's family, Daph's folks, and Val's dad are more than enough.

Bert: So, did you guys have a good time this Christmas?

Mike: In general, yeah. In fact, I think this was some of the most fun I've had this year, and I ain't usually into Christmas.

Peter: It's been a couple of years since we've seen the Basses, so getting to help them out was nice.

Micky: I'm glad we were able to help them out.

Mike: Yeah, that was some of the most fun I've ever had in one of these Christmas stories.

Bert: Where did the girls go?

Micky: Lauren went for a nap.

Mike: Em's tucking our kiddies into bed. She'll probably be down shortly.

Peter: Val took Austin and Jordan home.

Davy: Daph took Lizzie home.

Emma: (As she comes downstairs) Hi, everyone. The kids are in bed. I think Lauren's awake, but she needs a few minutes.

Mike: I thought they'd never get to sleep. Too much peppermint ice cream and excitement, I guess.

Emma: Micky, your son is still sorry about the spaghetti. He told me twice.

Micky: Poor kid...

Emma: It was a little embarrassing, but I told him there was no harm done...and Uncle Eugene was acting a lot worse than he was. He just needs to eat more carefully when he's out at a restaurant.

Davy: Well, take a look at who he learned from.

Bob: (Grins at Micky) No kidding.

Peter: I'm just glad Christmas is over now. We can concentrate on two birthdays and Micky's New Year's Party. We've switched venues for it a couple of times, but it worked out pretty well in the Montgomery House last year.

Mike: And I'm sure Micky is looking forward to the New Year's Party.

Micky: Of course!

Peter: Hey, could we do another round robin story, like we did last year? That was a lot of fun!

Davy: Sounds like fun.

Emma: You bet! That's going to be our story next month. We like starting the year with an alternative-universe round robin story. It's something different, and it gives us a chance to do pure action after the more family-oriented holiday stuff.

Mike: Speakin' of traditions... (looks at Micky) ...I'd love to take the kids out to look at lights again next year. Katie and Robbie had a blast. They're still talkin' about it. They even liked gettin' lost.

Micky: I'd love to as well. Um, I will do my best to be better acquainted with the roads traveled, too.

Mike: You do that. The kids may not have minded, but bein' lost in the dark was kinda scary. I'll help you start work on that new map system for Urse. We might be able to do one for Rosemarie, too.

Micky: *nods* As long as I can get it made, I can put it in both of them.

Bert: So, where did you come up with the ideas for these stories this year?

Emma: In many cases, real life. For instance, my family really did go out to dinner at a fancy restaurant on top of the Marquis De Lafayette Hotel (in Cape May, not LA) that had great views. I think we went every Christmas night from 2000 to around 2004. I know we had my nephew there one year when he was really tiny. Alas, I believe the real restaurant has since shut down, but the hotel itself is still there.

Bob: What was your favorite part?

Mike: Takin' the kids on that lights ride, no matter how scary it got.

Emma: Shopping with the girls and the parade.

Peter: Appearing on the KLAC special.

Micky: I don't have a favorite. I enjoyed all of it.

Bert: How about you, Dave?

Davy: Dinner.

Bob: How come you did a series of skits again?

Emma: Bob, we wracked our brains for months, but we just could not come up with a linear holiday story that wasn't an imitation of the same old stuff everyone else has done. It worked a few years ago with our version of "A Christmas Carol," but I've really wanted to be more original since then. We decided that it was a lot easier to come up with ideas for holiday short stories than for the plot for one long one.

Mike: Christmas feels like a series of skits sometimes anyway.

Bert: Yeah, it does.

Bob: (Looks up; sees Lauren coming down the steps) Hi there. How are you feeling?

Lauren: Tired.

Bert: What was your favorite part of the Christmas stories this year?

Lauren: Well, just our whole family spending time together.

Emma: (Nods) We don't often do things as a family...and after last month, I just appreciate having a family left at all.

Mike: (Makes a face) Yeah. I'm so glad the devils are in jail. Even if they don't stay there forever, at least we know where they are now.

Bert: Speaking of the devils...let's turn back the clock a bit. What was your favorite story this year?

Emma: Last month's. Like I said in the tag for that story, we really worked hard on it, unlike some of the other stories we did this year.

Mike: Last New Year's round-robin story. I hope whatever we do next month can live up to it. That was really fun.

Peter: Though the premise was a little gross, I think my favorite was the one where we had to drag the dead man around Coconut Island. As frightening as that was initially, I think it ended up being the best Memorial Day Weekend I ever had.

Emma: Considering who was involved in it, I'll bet Lauren's favorite was the Bake-Off story.

Lauren: It was fun, especially watching Mick squirm during that.

Micky: Yeah, yeah.

Bert: How about you guys? Mick, Davy?

Micky: Going back to Zlotnick was fun.

Davy: I'd have to go with the pirates.

Bob: And speaking of the new year...what would you like to see more of this year, or change for the stories or how you do them?

Emma: (Sighs) We need to come up with more ideas for the spring stories. I don't want to over do it - the lack of spontaneity and improv really hurt a couple of stories this year, including a couple in the spring demon four-parter and the big Halloween story - but we don't really have much right now.

Bert: So, you need to do more improv and be less structured.

Emma: (Nods) Take last month's story. We only had the most basic ideas that we'd be scattered across the globe and where we'd be. We came up with a lot of the second half as we went along, and it's really more fun that way.

Mike: Or the round-robin story. Hell, we were just tellin' tales there, and I think it's one of my favorite stories ever. Half of us were even drunk off our minds, and it still came out good.

Bert: How about you, Lauren? Anything you want to see changed or done differently or improved in the New Year?

Lauren: Truthfully, I don't know. Every time I think we need to do a story one way, it turns out another way would be better. *shrugs* I'm just going to take things as they come.

Emma: Oh, and we are going to be doing a four-parter again this spring. All we can say now is it will involve our ancestors.

Mike: I'm actually lookin' forward to that. We ain't seen any of them since the incident in New England with the blizzard and the ice maze years ago.

Peter: (Nods) I've often wondered what happened to them.

Emma: So have we. We're going to dive a bit further into Ursula's history as well.

Mike: I'm really lookin' forward to THAT. It's about time she answered a few questions about herself.

Peter: Like where she was between being lost by our ancestors and found by Zero and his people, has she ever given powers to anyone else, how DID she get in that crystal...

Mike: (Nods) Yeah, that.

Bert: What about that vacation Val was talking about?

Peter: (Grins) We're leaving for a week of nothing but sun and fun in the tropics in late February.

Mike: Yeah. Mick's ma is going to come down and watch Lizzie and the Dolenz kids, and our kids and Jordan and Austin will stay at the Cartwright Mansion.

Micky: It's gonna be fun.

Emma: Yeah. I'm sure we'll have a great time. Reading a new book by the pool...

Mike: Havin' a drink in the bar, somethin ' with one of those little umbrellas...

Peter: Hearing new music and talking to people from other cultures...

Lauren: Relaxing.

Bob: And you're due right after you get back, right Lauren?

Mike: We already checked. There is a hospital on the island.

Lauren: Yup, that's why I'm looking forward to relaxing.

Peter: It'll be a wonderfully romantic way to spend Valentine's Day, too.

Mike: Beats bein' stranded on some random island in Baja California. At least this way, we know what island we're on.

Bert: Hey guys, what's going to happen after that little jam at the end of the KLAC special? You seemed to be doing really well, playing together.

Mike: (Shakes his head) Oh no. We've had tons of calls askin' if we're back together, and the answer's no. The Guardians are still a group, but Pete n' me have our own lives now. Right, Pete?

Peter: (Half-smiles) Yeah. I might get back into music someday, but for now...I'm a teacher.

Mike: And I run a company. I've had enough of the show business grind.

Peter: We are going to continue training and patrolling after the holidays are over, though. The Guardians are still very much in business.

Mike: As you saw durin' the story with Kris and Jess.

Peter: We're going to spend some time at our island training facility this winter as well.

Mike: If the spring's gonna be that bad, we really need to step things up a little. We saw just how out-of-shape we are last month.

Bert: Micky and Davy, what about you? Are you going to continue touring with Tommy Boyce and Bobby Hart?

Davy: *Nods* For the time being.

Emma: (Shrugs) I'm going to stick to writing.

Mike: The KLAC special was a one-time-only deal, because we happened to be there. Call it a Christmas treat for the LA area.

Peter: It was fun to play for them again.

Mike: Yeah, but it ain't my line of work anymore.

Emma: (Yawns) I think it's time we took this to the last video. I'm really tired. We've had a long holiday season!

Mike: Yeah. (Turns to the camera and grins) Oh yeah. We want to thank the, ahem, other members of our little clan who volunteered as extras in this story.

Peter: Hey Micky, did Al ever tell you what happened to Brian's arm after that nasty spill at the parade?

Mike: Yeah, man. I really felt for the poor guy.

Micky: *Sighs* Broke his clavicle. He's got his arm in a sling for a few weeks.

Mike: Ouch.

Peter: That literally hurt.

Mike: Definitely not the way I'd want to spend my Christmas season.

Emma: Ok, why don't we all sign out, then I'll take us to the video?

Peter: (Nods) Right. (To the camera) We here at Dream World hope that everyone in our audience has the happiest and safest of holiday seasons.

Mike: Yeah. See 'ya next year, folks.

Micky: Bye!

(We fade out on the group waving to the camera as they all shout "Merry Christmas!" in unison.)

(Fade in on the bandstand at the Pad, right in front of the big picture window. It's night. We see small lights from various houses out the windows, but little else. The room itself is dim except for the lights on the Christmas tree. The four Monkees each hold a candle, which flicker as they perform their annual version of "Riu Chiu." They all blow their candles out as the song ends and the lights on the tree switch off.)

(And we cut to "Riu Chiu" again, this time played over scenes from the "production." We end with a live scene of the entire cast and crew waving and wish a Merry Christmas as we cut to "A Raybert Production" in green font on the red holly-border background.)