Everyone ready for some more fun in the Wild, Wild West?

Mike: Now we're talkin'.

Peter: I'm ready!

Micky: You bet I am!

Davy: Ready.

(Fade in on the Montgomery House Ballroom again. Micky grins at the group.)

Emma: Well, what's the big plan?

Mike: Hey Mick, mind if I take over and detail that plan?

Micky: Go for it, Mike.

Mike: Thanks. So, the group drives into a real wild west town...

(Fade out on Mike as he tells the story. Fade in on Mike as he drives the Van Dyke into what looks like the set from "Wild West Monkees." All four Monkees have traded their Victorian clothes for cowboy clothes, though they still wear goggles. Mike stops next to a building with a sign saying "Frost's House" out front.)

Mike: (Shrugs) Seems quiet enough.

Peter: I don't trust it though, Michael. It's too quiet.

(They all enter the bar...and everyone in the saloon stops and stares at them. It's the familiar, oft-used bar set with more western trappings and cowboys lolling around. A blond woman with high cheekbones in a very low-cut ruffled gown sidles up to the boys.)

Blond: (Narrows her eyes) Are your names Nesmith, Dolenz, Thorkleson, and Jones?

Mike: (Frowns) Yeah, lady. What's it to 'ya?

Blond: We have someone who wants to see you in the back room. They've been askin' 'bout ya. They say you're one of the most wanted gangs in the East.

Mike: Wanted car designers, maybe. We ain't done nothin' that bad (mutters) recently.

Blond: (Points to the back room) They're waitin' for you in there.

Micky: I don't like the sound of that.

Mike: If it gets ugly, we leave.

Peter: Maybe someone wants to give us something for the race!

(They follow Frost into the room. Several men in cowboy outfits stand around a large, rough-hewn table. Abernathy and Max, both in black cowboy costumes, and Bela in his regular slick suits, are with them.)

Frost: Here's the men you were talking about. (Makes a face) Now, where's my money? You promised me a thousand dollar reward for bringing you these four ruffians!

Mike: (Points at Abernathy) They're the ruffians! We're just passin' through! He's nothin' but a low-down, sneaky tyrant!

Peter: Mr. Lensherr, you know we're not bandits! We'd never steal from anyone!

Abernathy: Ain't that just like criminals, Sir, tryin' to blame upstanding citizens for their crimes.

Micky: Oh, this is ridiculous.

Frost: Where's my money, Lensherr! You pay me, or my boys will let these criminals go!

Mike: He ain't gonna pay ya! He's a big liar!

Frost: If you don't pay me, Lensherr, like we agreed, these boys are free to go!

Bela: Are you kidding? I only said that to get them here. >

Frost: What? You RAT! You cad! You scoundrel! Brian! Take care of this rapscallion!

Mike: Brian? Sounds familiar.

Brian: *A familiar spiky haired blond man walks over to Bela, pushing his sleeves up* I was hoping for this turn of events.

Frost: Attack that man! (Points at Bela) He won't pay me what he promised for bringing these criminals in!

Abernathy: (He rolls up his sleeves) We could take this guy, right Max?

Max: Yeah, he don't look so tough!

Brian: *Smirks* Try me.

Abernathy: My pleasure! (He takes a swing at Brian)

Peter: (Steps back) This could get ugly...

*Brian ducks and swings his fist right into Abernathy's gut.*

(Abernathy slams back into Max, knocking both into the wall.)

Mike: (Grins) Hey, nice right hook there, buddy!

Frost: Why do you think I keep him around?

Mike: (Points to Bela Lensherr) Get him!

Brian: Gladly. *goes after Bela*

(The men with Bela get between him and Brian.)

Mike: Micky, you boys go after the goons. I'll help Brian with the meat of the problem.

Micky: Aye aye, Captain!

("Oklahoma Backroom Dancer" begins as the boys attack Bela's men. Mike and Brian go after Bela himself. Frost hits whomever with her ruffled parasol.)

(Abernathy and Max recover and go after Mike, but he knocks them both against the wall again, effectively removing them from the fight once more.)

(The fight is starting to get crowded. Peter, Davy, and Micky grab the table and shove all the thugs into the main room...and right into a table filled with guys drinking ale.)

Peter: (Looks at Micky and gulps) Uh oh.

Micky: This isn't good.

(The men jump on the Monkees and throw their ale at them!)

(The saloon bursts open at this point. Emma, Lauren, Valerie, Daphne, and the hillbillies arrive. The hillbillies sport their pitchforks and rifles. They're followed by a tall, blond fellow with curls in a cowboy outfit, carrying six-shooters and looking ready to use them.)

Emma: Sheriff, there's Mr. Lensherr! He was interfering in Mr. Babbitt's race!

Mike: Sheriff, we'd like to...oof! (He's knocked into by three more goons.)

(More people are joining in the fight. Emma grabs her pen and tries to take stories from everyone. Daphne sets up her camera and takes photos!)

(Abernathy and Max stumble out of the back room. Abernathy is immediately knocked back in by three cowboys.)

(Valerie joins Frost in hitting people with her parasol.)

*Lauren goes after Max, causing him to try to run away from her.*

(Max ducks under a table, quaking with fear.)

Mike: (He grabs Bela as the song ends) That's it, Bela. You and me, in the square. Now. Let's have it out, right here, right now.

Emma: (Looks up from her writing) Are you crazy, Mike?

Peter: Michael...

Bela: If that is what you wish...

Emma: Sheriff, is this allowed? Surely, there must be some law...

Abernathy: Yeah, I'll bet the Sir will blow that little twerp away, right Max? Max?

(But Max is still hiding under the table. Abernathy drags him out.)

Abernathy: Max, you're embarrassing me!

Max: Is she gone?

Mike: Ok Bela, let's go out there and take each other on. I've wanted a piece of you ever since you bled me dry when I first came to New York.

Bela: Lets go.

(Cut to outside. The Monkees and the women stand in front of the saloon. Bela and his men are on the other side of town.)

Peter: Michael, I hope you know what you're doing.

Emma: Mike, what's this all about?

Mike: Just settlin' a score, Em.

(Cut to the other side of town. Abernathy and Max smirk.)

Abernathy: Soon as he pulls his gun, we send out the boys, right Sir?

Max: Boy, is he a dolt if he thinks Sir is gonna fight without back-up!

Abernathy: When do you want me to send out our men?

Max: (Points to Mike, who steps out to the street) He's comin' now!

Mike: (Calls to Bela as he strides into the middle of the street) You ready, Bela, or you gonna chicken out?

Emma: Mike, please! Don't do this!

Mike: (Ignores Emma) Well, Bela?

(Bela steps into the street, now wearing an expensive black cowboy hat and carrying shiny, pearl-handled guns.)

Mike: Took you long enough.

Abernathy: Go get him, Sir!

Peter: Oh Michael, be careful!

Bela: I intend to.

Emma: I wish he'd tell me what this is all about!

Mike: Ok, Bela. You go to the end of the street, and when we turn, we fire. Got that?

Bela: Yes.

(The two men each turn and walk down the street. We cut between the groups watching - the hillbillies, Abernathy and Max, the girls and the other Monkees, the townspeople. Mike finally turns and raises his guns.)

*Suddenly, Bela's boys appear.*

Mike: (Smirks) I had the feeling you'd pull somethin' like this, Bela. (We hear whooping and hollering in the distance) There's my boys now. (Turns to Micky) Good work, Mick. Your relatives are right on time.

Micky: Always.

("Mommy and Daddy" begins as Micky's Indian family comes roaring into town. The townspeople pull out their guns, but Peter and Valerie try to calm them. Emma whips out her pad and orders Daphne to take tons of pictures.)

(The hillbillies lift their pitchforks and happily jump into the fray!)

(Frost grins at Brian and points to the crowd. She never had any problems with Indians, as long as they don't put arrows through the saloon doors.)

(Mike hits Bela square across the chin.)

(Peter grabs a bow and arrow from one of the Indian braves and starts shooting.)

(Abernathy and another goon go after Micky and Davy.)

(Max tries to go after Lauren without his knees getting weak.)

(The hillbillies jab people with their pitchforks, cackling when they do.)

(Mike and Bela are really going at each other. Brian joins them, grinning.)

(The Indians have rounded up Bela's men as the song ends. Mike shakes his fist under Bela's nose; Brian has him by the collar.)

Mike: You're through, Lensherr.

(Bela just laughs. He tickles Brian's nose. Brian sneezes and drops him. Abernathy shows up with their black car, Max and several gallon jugs in the back.)

Abernathy: Come on, Sir! Let's go!

Valerie: (Screams) I recognize that! It looks like our gas supply!

Peter: He's stealing our gas!

Mike: Come on, everyone! We've gotta stop him! (The groups make for their cars again. Micky leans out the passenger side as the boys jump in their car.)

Micky: *waves at the Indians* Thanks, guys!

Indian Warrior #1: (As he leads a thug to the jail) Anytime, Laughing Water! Come visit us again sometime!

(And we fade out on the group as the three cars take off in the distance, the townspeople and the Indians waving good-bye as they go.)