ONE
backstage, early afternoon

"I hope we get away with this," Lauren said.

"I don't see what'd be wrong. It's not like we're gonna take anything," Joanie said.

The two girls walk down yet another hall.

"I hope it's here," Lauren said.

They find a door that says "Costumes".

Lauren tries the doorknob and the door opens. "Boy, I hope it's here!"

"You just said that," Joanie said.

"Just keep watch, huh, and let me peruse," Lauren said, and went over to the first rack of clothing.

"How hard could it be to find a bright orange shirt? Just look for the one that's blinding," Joanie commented.

"Oh, just shush and let me look," Lauren said, continuing her rummage. She moves over to the second rack. "Joanie!"

"What?" Joanie asked, coming over.

"I found it!" Lauren said. She grabs the hanger and pulls the shirt off the rack.

Joanie shields her eyes. "Dang, that thing is bright!" She chuckles.

"Well, part one's complete. Now, for the hard part... How do we get this into his dressing room without anyone seeing us?" Lauren said.

"I knew you'd drag me along on this, too," Joanie said, then grinned. "Thanks, by the way... Why don't we just go back the way we came and hope that the halls are still deserted."

They leave the room and start back down the hall.

TWO
Green Room

It's about an hour before tapings begin. Nearly everyone is lounging aroud. The door opens and Greg comes in, wearing his skull shirt.

"Look what I found!" Greg exclaimed, then smirked.

"I thought we buried that," Colin said, quietly.

"If we did, he dug it up," Ryan said, somewhat dryly.

Wayne looked up from his magazine. "There's only one thing that could offset that shirt."

"A purple jacket?" Greg asked.

"No... althought it'd look good. I meant that orange shirt Ryan had," Wayne replied.

"What orange shirt?" Ryan asked.

"Yeah, the Sunkist shirt!" Colin said.

"Do you know how many shirts I've got? How am I supposed to remember which one you're talking about?" Ryan said.

Greg came up next to Ryan. "I believe it was officially called 'Neon Love Chicken'... Ring a bell?"

"Oh, that one! Listen, if it's actually in my dressing room, I'll wear it for today's taping, okay?" Ryan said.

THREE
hallway, just outside Ryan's dressing room

Lauren and Joanie walk up to the door.

"Door's closed," Lauren said.

"Yup," Joanie agreed.

They stand there not doing anything.

"Well?" Joanie asked.

"Well, what?" Lauren asked.

"Ya gonna put the shirt in there or what?" Joanie asked.

"What if he's in there?" Lauren asked.

A grin forms across Joanie's face. Lauren sees it.

"You're right, let's risk it!" Lauren said, then opened the door.

The two girls peered in.

"Darn," Joanie said, disappointed.

Lauren went in and draped the shirt across the arm of the couch and returned to the doorway. "Okay, now, let's go grab our seats."

A few minutes later....

Ryan opens the door to his dressing room and immediately sees the bright orange shirt. He shook his head. "Greg."

FOUR
studio

The tapings for the day are about to begin.

Lauren and Joanie are trying to keep themselves from jumping out of their seats.

"Boy, I hope this is one where Drew comes out into the audience!" Joanie said.

"Don't worry, we'll get on somehow. I mean, we came prepared with suggestions for nearly every game they've ever played. If we're not seen, atleast we'll be heard!" Lauren said.

The audience coordinator comes out and quiets the crowd. He intro's Drew, who gets a decent applause. Drew then intro's the players and the applause gets louder for each player. They take their seats. Joanie and Lauren just stare at Ryan... who's wearing a bright orange shirt.

Drew goes up into one part of the audience to start his usual intro for the show. "...On tonight's show, snap crackle pop, Greg Proops..." Greg makes a face. "...nobody better lay a finger on my Butterfinger, Wayne Brady..." Wayne grins. "...leggo my Eggo, Colin Mochrie..." Colin looks from left to right. "...and Florida's Natural, Ryan Stiles..." Ryan just stares at the camera.

{*Florida's Natural is an orange juice... just in case it's not nationally known ::grin::}

Drew sits at his *desk*. "Welcome to 'Whsoe Line is it, Anyway?' the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter. Yup, the points don't matter... just like good fashion sense to Greg and Ryan!"

"Well!" Greg said, pretending to be offended, then pushed his glasses up with his middle finger.

Drew ignores it and moves on. "The first game is 'Questions Only' and is for everyone. Let's see, I need a suggestion of a type of store..."

"Clothing store!" Joanie and Lauren immediately shout.

"Geez, the audience is starting to come prepared... Maybe you guys oughtta try that," Drew said. "Okay, you're in a clothing store and you can only talk in questions... Ryan and Greg start."

Greg pretends to hold up an article of clothing on a hanger. "Is this one sale?"

"Does it say sale on the tag?" Ryan asked.

"Why isn't there a tag?"

"Didn't the rack say sale?"

"Why would it say sale if it said clearance?"

"Why did it say clearance?"

"Why are you wearing one of those shirts?"

Ryan pauses, unable to think up a comeback. "Because I want to!" He walks off just as Drew buzzes him.

Wayne takes Ryan's place. "Is that a Halloween costume?"

"Does it look like a Halloween costume?" Greg asked.

"Do you always wear shirts with skulls on them?"

"Do you always wear shirts that practically glow in the dark?"

"Do you want to see it glow?"

Greg cracks up and Drew buzzes him.

Colin takes Greg's place. "Do you know where the cashier stand is?"

"Didn't you see it on the way over here?" Wayne asked.

"Did it have a sign above it that said 'Check Out'?"

Wayne laughs. "Yes!"

Drew buzzes Wayne and Ryan takes his place.

"Did you know my shirt contains a week's worth of vitamin C?" Ryan asked.

Everyone cracks up and Drew gives the final buzz. Everyone continues laughing, then start to calm down.

"After this show, I wanna know the girls who suggested clothing store!" Ryan commented.

"A thousand points to the two girls who made that suggestion!" Drew said.

Joanie and Lauren look at each other with huge grins.

A few games later....

"The next game is 'Song Titles' where, you guessed it, they can speak only in song titles and this is for Ryan and Greg," Drew said.

They come forward.

"No, I need a suggestion of a place you'd go to have fun," Drew said.

"The beach!" Joanie blurted out.

Lauren laughed, then covered her mouth to quiet herself.

Drew looks out into the audience. "What's going on? We've only got two people shouting usuable suggestions..."

{*These are all actual song titles, so don't argue!}

"Catch a wave?" Ryan asked.

"Surfin' USA, Greg answered.

"Itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini," Ryan said, trying not to crack up.

"Little surfer girl," Greg replied.

"Dance, dance, dance?"

"They're coming to take me away, ha ha!"

"Hello, muddah, hello fadduh."

"Hello, goodbye."

"Last train to Clarksville?"

"Magic carpet ride."

"Incense and peppermints."

"Peppermint twist."

"Let's twist again."

"Micky's monkey."

"Come, go with me."

"I wanna be free."

"See you in September."

Drew buzzes, seeing no end in sight. "I could watch this all day... or for, at most, two minutes."

End of the show....

"Tonight's winner... me! I'm sitting this one out for fear of what those girls have as a suggestion for the 'Hoedown'... And I need a suggestion of someone's favorite TV show... besides this one and Drew Carey Show, of course."

Lauren yells "Laverne & Shirley" at the same time that Joanie yells "Happy Days".

"Hey, found something they couldn't agree on... Okay, let's use... Laverne & Shirley," Drew said.

Laura Hall starts to play the "Hoedown music'.

Greg starts:
I love watching Laverne & Shirley
It really is quite cool
I watch it day and night
And I never feel the fool
I have many tapes galore
And yes the show was a biggy
But now that it's in reruns
Some people ask if I was Squiggy!

Audience cracks up.

Wayne goes next:
Oh, I love the music on that show
Because it was just rock'n'roll
That guy Carmine could belt songs out
And it never took its toll
Although he wasn't the main character
His singing could've got him far
Now, twenty something years later
Look who's singing and being a star!

Audience cracks up again.

Colin's turn is up and he seems to now have any ideas. He waits through an extra music intro and falls on the ground on his face.

The audience goes wild, then calm down a bit.

Ryan looks confident:
I love watching classic television
My favorite is Laverne & Shirley
I'll watch it day or night
Even if I have to wake up early
There's something strange I've noticed
'Though I can't quite figure it out
Why people ask Greg if he was Squiggy
His Lenny would've been me... (out of song) That I doubt!

Audience cracks up yet again, although Lauren's laughing is the loudest and most embarrassed.

FIVE
studio, after the tapings

Most of the audience has left, but Lauren and Joanie are still there, standing in the aisle.

"I just can't believe it!" Lauren exclaimed, happily.

"That was absolutely hilarious! And we even got most of our suggestions used!" Joanie said.

"Well, that's because they were good suggestions."

The girls turn to find that Ryan came back out.

"I said I wanted to find you two," he said, then added, "You really like the shirt?"

"Like it? Lauren's got 'don't mess with the Neon Love Chicken' in her email signature!" Joanie said.

Lauren smacks her in the arm and gives her a glare.

"Somebody's got a crush!" Greg said, sing-song like as he crossed the stage. "And, look, she's even just aobut the same height as your wife!"

{::makes face at my own short joke::}

Joanie laughs. Lauren still looks slightly embarrassed, but breaks down into a laugh.

"Hey, the after show party is starting in the Green Room. You two wanna come?" Greg asked.

"Really!?" Lauren asked.

"We'd love to!" Joanie said.

"Sure. And it won't get too out of hand... We save all that for the tapings," Ryan said.

SIX
Green Room, about an hour later

The only ones still at the party are Drew, Wayne, Greg, Colin, Ryan... and, of course, Lauren and Joanie.

"That's gotta be one of our best shows yet," Drew commented.

"And we owe most of it to these two," Colin said, motioning to Joanie and Lauren.

"And the rest to Greg and Ryan for what you guys were wearing... And you thought some of my shirts were outrageous!" Wayne said.

"You know, I hadn't seen this shirt in atleast two or three years, I can't figure out how it ended up in my dressing room," Ryan said.

Lauren starts looking around the room, while Joanie starts whistling.

"Uh huh, yeah, I think the mystery's solved," Greg said. "You two found it and put it in there, didn't you?"

Lauren nods. "Yeah. I saw the show where the audience picked on that shirt and then Mike said 'don't mess with the Neon Love Chicken'. Even before that, I liked the shirt. I just thought it was something due for a return."

"And I was her tag-a-long," Joanie said, then grinned.

"I've been thinking..." Drew started.

"That's dangerous," Ryan interrupted.

Drew glared at him, then continued, "You two had alot of great suggestions for the games. Maybe you could come back for a few more tapings...?"

Joanie and Lauren look at each other, then turn back to everyone else. "Sure!" they agreed.