ONE
Burbank, Ragusa house, afternoon

Shirely is sitting on the couch, watching TV.

Carmine (coming in)- Hi, AngelFace!

Shirley- Hi, Carmine!

Carmine- Is it just me or are you actually cheerful?

Shirley- Cheerful.

Carmine (sits next to her)- Why?

Shirley- Guess!

Carmine- Awe, Shirl, I don't wanna guess. It'll be you jokin' that we're goin' back to Milwaukee or som'en.

Shirley- What if it wasn't a joke?

Carmine- Huh? Whadya mean?

Shirley- Laverne called and said that edna had gone back and bought our old building back and if we go to Milwaukee we'll get an apartment for a low rent!

Carmine- Discount rent, I like it. The only thing is, we'll hafta sell our house here to get atleast some of our money back.

Shirley- I called the newspaper and told them to start running a "For Sale" ad in tomorrow's paper.

Carmine- Well, let's start packin', then!

TWO
Milwaukee, Kosnowski apartment, next day, afternoon

Laverne and Edna are sitting on the couch.

Laverne- This is so wonderful what you'redoin' for Shirl and Carmine!

Lenny comes in.

Edna- Well, I figured since we all left here to go to Burbank, that we'd all like to come back.

Lenny- Yeah, even Squig.

Laverne- Whadya mean?

Lenny- He's already in our old apartment.

Edna- I had to let him have it... no one else would ever take that apartment!

Laverne- Yeah, I can understand that.

Lenny- So, what about Shirley and Carmine?

Laverne- Shirl seemed to be nearly bouncing off the walls when I called her yesterday. I think they're comin'.

Edna- Well, then I'd better go and make sure Carmine's old apartment is ready. (she gets up) I'll see you later. (she leaves)

Laverne- Well, I was lookin' in the newspaper before Edna came to find a job... nothin'. how'd you do?

Lenny (plops next to her)- We're zero in two.

Laverne- There's gotta be som'en, Edna can hold off the rent for only so long.

Lenny- Yeah, and we can only go so long without eatin'.

Laverne- That, too, and Tommy's gonna be needin' some new clothes.

Lenny- Already?

Laverne- He's outgrown half his wardrobe. (pause) I refuse to go back to Shotz! He'll try to makeme truck washer... again!

Lenny- how 'bout the Pizza Bowl?

Laverne glares at him.

Lenny- I know, I know... but it's som'en.

Laverne- True. Maybe we could wait atleast till Sirl and Carmine come, then we can all look together.

Lenny- We could call ourselves the Unemployed Gang. (he smiles at her)

Laverne- Not funny, Len.

Lenny (smile fades)- Sorry.

The door flies open.

Squiggy (coming in)- Hello! (he pulls out a wad of money and fans himself with it) What ta do wit' all this money.

Laverne (surprised)- Money? What money?

{What hat?!... Never mind}

Squiggy- Only this money. (he goes over to them and waves it around)

Lenny- Where'd ya get all that?

Squiggy- Shotz made me head truck driver. I'm gettin' paid like a exec-a-tive.

Lenny (to Laverne)- Still refuse to go ta Shotz?

Laverne (mesmorized by Squiggy's wad of money)- Uhh... well... I dunno...

Squiggy- Well, I'll be leavin' now to go spend this on things that're totally useless. (he leaves)

Lenny- Himself?

Laverne (still not quite all there)- All that money...?

Lenny (waves his hand in front of her face)- Snap outta it.

Laverne- I don't like it... but I guess we could try Shotz and see what he has ta offer.

THREE
next day

A cab pulls up outside of the apartment building. The door opens.

Carmine (getting out)- We shoulda rented a U-Haul!

Shirley (getting out)- Okay, Carmine, I heard you the first fifty times you said that!

Carmine- Next time we move, we're gettin' a U-Haul!

Shirley- How about we don't move again?

Carmine- Or that.

Shirley- Com'on, lets grab our bags and go in

They grab their bags and take them up to their apartment, drop them off, then go back downstairs to the Kosnowski apartment.

Shirley (knocks)- Anybody home?

O.S. Laverne- Comin'!

The door opens.

Laverne- Hiya, Shirl!

Shirley- Hiya, Vernie!

Carmine- Haven't you two gotten tired of reuniting yet?

Shirley grabs his arm and pulls him into the apartment.

Shirley- Found any jobs yet?

Laverne- Well, believe it or not, but Squiggy did. He went back to Shotz and got a whole load of money. Seeing that wad, we decided to go and see if there were any openings. To make a long story short...

Carmine- Too late.

Laverne- Shotz remembered us and apparently not Squig because we got turned away.

Shirley- That's not right at all. Is there anywhere else that has openings?

Laverne- Well, Len mentioned the Pizza Bowl, but I just don't think I could handle that, atleast not right away.

Carmine- Where is Lenny, anyway?

Laverne- Bronko's Garage.

Shirley- Huh?

Carmine- Bronko's... that was Fonzie's garage.

Laverne- Still is. I called Fonz to ask if he knew of any job openings and he's still lookin' for one for me, but he had an opening for Len. One outta two ain't bad.

Carmine- I wonder if Fonz knows who owns the dance studio now?

Laverne- That's it! The three of us could get jobs there!

Shirley- Great!

Carmine- Let's go see if Fonz can help.

Laverne- Of course he can help, he's The Fonz, ain't he?

They leave.

FOUR
Bronko's Garage

Fonzie is shining his motorcycle. Lenny comes out of the office.

Lenny- Slow day?

Fonzie- Potsie finall took m advice and stopped driving... and Potsie not driving lowers the accident rate.

Lenny- It might go up cuz Shotz made Squiggy head truck driver.

Fonzie (hits the handlebars, then goes back to his natural cool)- Don't say that name.

Lenny- Sorry, Fonz.

Laverne, Shirley, and Carmine come in.

Laverne- Hey, Len! (he smiles) Hiya, Fonz!

Fonzie- Laverne, what can The Fonz do for ya?

Laverne- We were wonderin' about Majorie Ward's Dance Studio?

Fonzie- It just so happens the studio is for sale and The Fonz would be proud to be a silent partner in helping you three get it.

Carmine- Thanks Fonz!

Shirley- Thank you, Fonzie!

Laverne- Lets go get the place!

They leave.

Lenny- Why'd you say you'd be a silent partner?

Fonzie- I know how much that dance studio is goin' for and I couldn't pay you enough in advance, so I figured silent partner, that way I'll have more time to pay. (pause) I don't hear any sirens yet, so I think it'll be safe to close up early. Besides, if I can get your kid to gimme a thumbs-up, I'll pay ya an hour overtime.

Lenny- Let's hope we can get him from Edna first!

FIVE
early night, Kosnowski apartment

Laverne and Lenny are sitting on the couch.

Lenny- I guess our job search is over.

Laverne- Thank goodness! (pause) boy, that sure was nice of Fonz to watch tomy for a few hours. I was gonna go help Shirl and Carmine start fixin' up the dance studio, but I think they'll do okay.

Lenny- But if it's just the two of them...

Laverne- They'll be chasing each other all over the place and end in a tackle!

Lenny- That don't sound like a bad idea...

Laverne jumps up and runs towards and into the bedroom with Lenny right behind her.

{Btw, there was alotta chasing and tackling goin' on at the dance studio, too!}