Co written by Ashley (LavernShrl) and Michelle (ShirlFeeny)
Now, it's the day that Carmine is supposed to come back from his trip. Lenny and Laverne have made up and now flipping through books for baby names and stuff. Someone now knocks on the door and Shirley runs and opens it and there stands Carmine with a trophy and.... a little girl.
Shirley: Carmine! ::with a sort of shock voice::
You're back! And you brought....
Carmine: Don't worry, Shirl, she's my niece and
I'm just baby sitting.
Shirley: In that case, Laverne and Lenny can
watch her for a while.
Carmine: Why a while?
Laverne: Just go ahead and say yes Carmine... I
think you're gonna get lucky!
Shirley: ::glaring at Laverne:: Must you?!
Laverne: What?!
Shirley: I mean really! There is a little girl
here, and your mind just sashays down smut lane!
Laverne: My mind ALWAYS sashays down smut lane!
(everyone except Shirley laughs)
Carmine: La...(notices that Laverne is getting a
little large around the middle) Laverne! You really
porked down those Scooter Pies while I was gone,
didn't ya?
Laverne: Shut your mouth, Carmine, heh?
Shirley: I'll tell you later Carmine, but right
now, let's go upstairs, I have to reward you!
::Carmine raises his eyebrow and puts a big goofy grin on his face as Shirley leads him up the stairs and Shirl slams the door::
Carmine's Niece: Where's Uncle Carmine going?
Laverne: ::picks her up and sits her down on the
couch:: See, when you get older, you're gonna learn
the phrase 'Get lucky'.
Niece: Get happy?
Laverne: That too, but for your Uncle Carmine,
when ever Shirl does what she just did, he's lucky.
Niece: Oh.
Laverne: So... what's your name, kid?
Niece: Lauren.
Laverne: Lauren, huh? Well, Lauren, can I get ya
some readin' material? The Pokey Little Puppy,
National Geographic... True Confessions?
Lenny: ::pulling her down toward him:: Laverne,
don't ya think she's just a little... young... for
True Confessions?
Laverne: You're never too young for True
Confessions.
Lenny: What ever you say.
Lauren: Can I go see Uncle Carmine?
Laverne: Right now?
::she nods her head and looks at Laverne with big innocent eyes::
Laverne: See Lauren, this don't happen very often
to your uncle Carmine.
Lauren: Ohhh. He doesn't get lucky too much?
Lenny: I think you could say that.
Lauren: So I gotta leave him alone with Shorty?
Laverne: Shirley.
Lauren: Whatever. I gotta leave him alone with
her?
Laverne: Yeah. For right now anyways.
Next scene: Carmine's Apartment
Shirley: Oh Carmine, tell me all about it! How was
Anaheim?!
Carmine: Forget Anaheim, I wanna know why Laverne
& Lenny were lookin' through baby name books, and at
the same time makin' goo goo eyes at each other. They
wouldn't be planning ahead would they?
Shirley: Not exactly.
Carmine: Well then what is it exactly?!
Shirley: Okay, Carmine brace yourself.
Carmine: I don't like it when ya say "brace
yourself", Shirl. It's always something bad or
smutty.
Shirley: Well.... this time it's both. Remember
how you said planning ahead?
Well.....
::from Laverne & Shirley's apartment, Lenny,
Laverne, and Lauren hear Carmine shouting "Are they
nuts?!!"::
Laverne: I guess he heard the good news.
Lauren: Is he getting lucky again?
Lenny: Not exactly.....
::later that night, Carmine has taken Lauren
to her mother's house only 20 minutes away and now he
and Shirley are in her apartment on the couch...
well..... Shirley's welcoming him back. After her
welcome, she throws her arms around him::
Carmine: ::with a big grin on his face:: Wow, that
was great.
Shirley: ::with an icky sweet grin on her face::
That was just your welcome back kiss!
Carmine: That was just me...::laughs
hysterically::
Shirley: Shut up and kiss me.
::she wraps her arms around him and they kiss passionately. Then they stop and he looks at her::
Carmine: Shirl, I've been wondering....
Shirley: Yes Angel lips?
Carmine: ::he blushes then looks at her:: What
did you do while I was gone?
Shirley: ::suddenly very uncomfortable:: Well
nothing! Really! Nothing, I swear!
Carmine: Okay, okay, you sure? 'Cause I thought
that you and Lenny....
Shirley: Me and Lenny didn't do nothin' I swear!
I love you and only you Angel lips!
Carmine: I love you too angelface. But I was
gonna say is that you knew Lenny was gonna propose to
Laverne, right?
::Shirley sits there in shock and humiliation then just kisses him so he doesn't ask any other questions. They lie down on the couch and we zoom out because too much smut ruins the script.::
THE END