Ok everyone, ready for some more stakeout?

Mike: Sure, why not?

Peter: I'm actually enjoying this.

Davy: So am I.

Micky: I'd enjoy it more without a certain someone joining us.

(We open right where we left off, at Millie's. It's much later in the night. The camera focuses on two open boxes of pizza that are empty. Everyone sits around one of the tables, leaning back with hands on stomachs.)

Mike: (Groans) I can't believe how much we ate.

Peter: I'm more than full. I'm...really, really full.

*Sach snores, sprawled out across the counter.*

Davy: I'm pretty full, too.

Micky: I'm fine.

Slip: I'm surprised you and Sach left enough for the rest of us to get full on.

Mike: No kiddin'. I knew we should have bought a third pie just for the two of you.

Slip: That'd just make Sach a glutton. He don't need the help.

Davy: Neither does Mick.

Peter: (He looks over his shoulder) There hasn't been anything out there for a while. I wonder what's going on?

Mike: I hope Freddy Rogers is ok. He was a nice guy.

Micky: I'll go take another look around. *He moves the telescope around to check out the around around the building.* Hey, guys, there's something going on in the alley, but I can't tell what.

Mike: The alley? Who would be out there at this time of night?

Peter: Maybe a robber?

Mike: (Sniffs...and frowns) I don't like this. I smell sugar, chemicals...and danger.

Slip: *stands* Danger, huh? Let’s go find out.

(Cut to outside. We get a shot of the long, narrow alleyway between the buildings. It's dark and shadowy. The four Monkees and their two friends step into the darkness.)

Mike: Boy, it's spooky out here.

Peter: (Gulps) I hope we don't find anything.

Sach: I can't believe you woke me up for this!

Sach: I'm afraid of the dark, you know!

Slip: Quit yer belly achin' and shudup!

Mike: Hello? (He looks around, sniffing) I still smell danger and sugar, and it's stronger over here.

Peter: That means there's something... (He looks around) I though I heard something. Something squishing.

Mike: (Listens, his ears almost seeming to perk) I hear it, too. It sounds like someone walking through the muck.

Sach: Sounds like a bad night at Louie's after throwing ice cream at us because of our tab.

*Slip belts Sach with his hat.*

Sach: *winces* Sorry, Chief, but it does.

Slip: Then how about you go take a look, hmmm? *gives Sach a shove farther into the alley*

Sach: *stumbles but stays upright* Oop, oh, I really made the Chief mad with that. *looks around* Hello? Anyone here? No? Okay, good bye! *starts to turn when the squishing sound returns*

Sach: Hello? *Moves farther into the alley, then stops cold* Ohhhh...ohhh...

(A huge, lumpy creature steps into the limelight. He seems to be dripping brown, pink, and yellowish goo. He makes a strange, horrible sound, like a moaning. Three other creatures follow them.)

*Sach's eyes widen. He tries to call out, but his voice won't work. He stumbles back and hits the wall of the building.*

(The largest monster moans louder and leans over Sach, dripping goo onto him.)

*Sach starts crying loudly.*

*Back out at the front of the alley, the others wait. Suddenly, Sach's crying breaks the quiet.*

Slip: That's Sach crying. Crazy maniac probably stubbed his toe.

Mike: (Sniffs) No, I think there's somethin' wrong here.

Peter: What's that moaning?

Micky: We'd better go find out!

("Your Auntie Grizelda" begins as the boys dart into the alley...only to confront the lumbering monsters dripping over the horrified Sach!)

(Mike tries to punch one of them...but only finds himself with a hand stuck in brown-pink goo.)

*Slip runs into the monster hovering over Sach and ends up stuck to the monster.*

*Micky grabs a garbage can lid to use as a shield, blocking the goo from the monster coming after him and Davy.*

(Peter ducks under the monsters, trying to avoid the goo. He licks his fingers after accidentally brushing one of the monsters.)

Peter: It's ice cream! They're covered in ice cream! (He makes a face) Frazzlemeyer's ice cream, from the taste of it.

Slip: *Trying to unstick himself* That don't change the fact this is still revoltin'!

(Mike ducks away from the monster and lets it run into the alley wall. It does and gets stuck there.)

(Peter goes over to Slip to try to help him out.)

*Meanwhile, Sach is still huddled against the wall.*

(Mike pulls Sach away from the wall as another monster runs into it.)

Sach: *Hugs Mike* Oh, thank you, Mike, thank you!

Mike: Oof! (Gasps) Dang, do you go to the same gym as Pete?

Sach: I don't go to no gym.

Peter: (As the music ends) They're gone now. They just disappeared!

Micky: That was weird!

Slip: *Trying to brush off the ice cream* I just had this suit clean two months ago.

Mike: What the HECK was that about?

Peter: I don't know, but it was sticky. Did anyone else get a taste?

Slip: *Motions to his ice cream covered self* Whadaya think?

Mike: Well, how did it taste?

Slip: *Gets some on a finger and tastes it* It's... *His eyes appear to get glassy. A lopsided grin appears on his face.*

Sach: Uh oh. I've never seen that look on the Chief's face before.

Mike: Slip, what's wrong with you, man?

Peter: Slip?

Micky: *Waves a hand in front of Slip's face* Hey, man, you okay?

*Slip chuckles uncharacteristically.*

Sach: Chief?

*Slip reaches into his jacket pocket and produces a set of jacks and a rubber ball.*

Slip: Wanna play some Jacks?

Sach: *grins widely* My Jacks! Chief, you found them!

*The pair sit on the ground and start to play.*

Davy: What in the world...

Mike: You know, if it weren't so late, I'd almost be tempted to leave them. They look like they're having fun.

Peter: (Shakes Slip's shoulder) Slip? How did the ice cream taste?

Slip: *Grinning* It was yummy!

Micky: Oh-kaaay. There's definitely something wrong with him.

Peter: (Makes a face) I got a taste of it, and it was still terrible.

Mike: As much as I hate to break up the game, we have to get home and get these guys back to theirs.

Micky: And Slip needs to clean up.

Slip: *Head snaps up* I ain't takin' no bath!

Mike: Maybe we could just dump water and soap on him.

Peter: (Grins) Why don't we do that?

Sach: *Looks up* Do what?

Micky: *grins* I like that idea.

Mike: We could just imagine it here. These guys know what we can do.

Sach: Let me save my Jacks first! *picks up the jacks and ball*

Slip: I wasn't done playin'!

Sach: It's gettin' late, Chief! We'll be late for supper!

Slip: Just one more game!

(Mike makes a bucket appear in a blue light. He throws it over Slip's head.)

Mike: There. You needed a bath.

Micky: Me next! *does the same as Mike*

*Slip cries out, then ends up cringing. Slowly, he glares at Mike and Micky.*

Slip: Whadja do THAT for?

Sach: Chief?

Slip: What? *Turns to Sach and belts him with his wet hat* This was prob'ly your idea!

Sach: *Throws his arms over his head to protect himself* Oop, the Chief's back!

Slip: Back? I didn't go nowhere! *continues to belt Sach with his hat*

Davy: Mates, maybe we should stop him.

Mike: Sounds like you're you again, Slip.

Slip: Obliviously I'm me! Why're you askin' how I feel? *wrings out his wet hat*

Sach: Because you was playin' Jacks with me about two minutes ago.

Slip: *Blinks* I was what?

Sach: You tried some of that ice cream you were covered in, then you wanted to play Jacks with me.

Mike: You were playin' jacks with Sach like a kid. Havin' a good time, too.

Peter: This is going to sound strange, but did you feel...less intelligent...after you ate that ice cream?

Slip: *Glowers* I felt like 'im. *jerks a thumb at Sach*

Sach: *Throws an arm around him* Aw Chief, you say such nice things!

Slip: Gedoffame! *Groans* This is so humidifying.

Mike: Now that Slip's ok, I think we ought to get back to Millie's. We need to get home. We'll discuss this tomorrow.

Peter: And Slip needs a real bath.

Slip: Presumably one without so many audiences.

Mike: Let's get goin'.

(The boys help Slip to his feet. Mike makes the bucket disappear, Sach grabs his jacks, and they head out of the alley, leaving the monsters attached to the wall.)

(Cut to the next morning. Mike, Peter, Micky, and Davy come into Millie's and are quite surprised to find that Slip and Sach are the only ones there.)

Mike: (As they sit down) Hi, guys. Where is everyone? This is usually one of your busy times of the day.

Slip: They'll all consecratin' across the street.

Peter: I can't believe Frazzlemeyer's is really that popular! Their ice cream is terrible!

Mike: And we saw what it did to Slip.

Peter: Slip, do you remember anything about last night?

Slip: As much as I'd like not to, I unfortuitively do.

Peter: How did you feel when you ate that ice cream?

Mike: It didn't do nuthin' to us but make us pucker up really good.

Peter: You said you felt like Sach.

Mike: What I want to know is where those monsters came from, and what in the heck happened to Freddy Rogers?

Peter: Do you think the monsters got him?

Mike: They sure weren't interested in hurtin' us. They weren't like the demons. They just wandered around and looked ugly.

Slip: I dunno what those things were, but I know I don't wanna came face to face wit' them again. Had to take three showers to get all that ice cream off.

Sach: And the first shower was completely clothed.

Slip: *Reaches for his hat, which isn't there* Be glad I don't wear my hat when we're workin', Sach.

(Jessie and Nyles come in at this point, arm in arm. Jessie waves at the group at the booth.)

Jessie: Hi, boys! How's everything? Have you made any more music videos yet?

Mike: (Shakes his head) We're between videos right now. Herman has another gig in Pennsylvania. He’ll be back tomorrow, though.

Jessie: I can't wait until you do. I love appearing on TV! It's fun!

Nyles: You got that right, babe!

Mike: How come you guys are here? I figured you'd be trying that new place across the street.

Jessie: We already did! (Makes a face) Their stuff tastes terrible! I don't know why everyone loves it.

Peter: (Raises an eyebrow) You didn't like it?

Jessie: It tasted so sour! Even Nyles wouldn't eat it!

Mike: There's something Nyles won't eat?

Nyles: Stuff was really gross!

Peter: That's interesting. We couldn't eat it, either. Mike, Micky, Davy, and I thought it tasted sour, too. Slip had it and said it was quite good, but it made him act strange.

Jessie: Strange?

Mike: He played jacks with Sach.

Jessie: That's strange.

Slip: Could you please not repeat that to the world?

Peter: We ran into monsters, too, that seemed to be made of ice cream. Mike and I peeked in that alley again this morning and they were gone. There wasn't a trace of them, not even melting ice cream.

Jessie: Ice cream monsters! This is starting to sound like a Scooby Doo episode! We need a really hungry dog or something around here.

Mike: Micky can be Shaggy. He has the same hair and appetite.

Micky: Very nice.

Peter: We don't know where the monsters went, how they got out, or what they were doing out there.

Mike: We're worried about Freddy Rogers, too, the guy who used to own that store. We think we saw someone doin' somethin' to him in Frazzlemeyer's last night.

Jessie: I used to know Freddy! Nice guy. He was a friend of Nyles', too. He was gonna turn that drug store into a great surf shop and smoothie shack.

Mike: No one's seen him since Frazzlemeyer bought the place. He supposedly left town, but that don't seem to be the case.

Nyles: We gotta find out what happened to him.

Mike: After we have our snack, I think we ought to go back to Frazzlemeyer's and figure out what's going on.

(That's when a couple of tough-looking guys in polyester suits come walking in. They push chairs aside and plop in a booth.)

*Sach busies himself behind the counter.*

Goon #1: Hey, we want some business here!

Slip: I guess that's my cue. I'll be back. *goes over to wait on them*

Slip: What'll ya have?

Goon #2: (Smirks) We’ll have four large chocolate shakes, two slices of plain cheesecake, and a waiter I can actually see.

Slip: *Forces a small smile* How very clever of you, shorty.

Goon #2: Hey, he's callin' ME shorty!

Mike: Why don't you leave him alone?

Peter: (Mutters) Michael, stay out of this.

Micky: Slip can take care of himself.

Slip: Yeah, I am. What's it to ya?

Goon #1: Why don't you get our milkshakes, short stuff? Maybe they'll be taller than you.

Slip: Why I oughta.... *pauses, remembering his job* Comin' right up, *grits his teeth* gentlemen. *leaves to go put in the order*

Mike: Why are you boys pickin' on him?

Goon #2: Why not? He's there, skinny.

Mike: Watch it, pal. I don't have a job to worry about.

Micky: That's a new one.

Peter: I really don't think this is a good idea, guys. Why don't we all just shake hands and stop this?

Micky: They don't look like the hand-shaking type.

*Slip comes out with the goons' orders and sets the tray on the table.*

Goon #1: Thanks, short stuff.

Slip: *Holding a plate of cheesecake* What was that? I'm a little hard of hearin'...

Goon #1: (As he gulps his milkshake) You heard me, runt.

Mike: Oh, shit. He looks like he's gonna blow.

Peter: At least take it outside!

Slip: *Forces a large smile* Thank you. *Smooshes the cake in the goon's face* Now, if you are precipitant enough, you'll follow me outside so that we may finish this charade.

Mike: Oh shit. Here we go.

("The Kind of Girl I Could Love" begins as Slip and the goons head out the door to Millie's parking lot. Everyone but Peter exchanges looks and immediately follows them. Peter goes over to the pay phone by the bathrooms and dials a number.)

Peter: (Over the music) Hi, officers. I'd like to report people disturbing the peace...

*Sach settles himself in the Monkeemobile to cheer everyone on.*

Slip: *Rolls up his sleeves* Now that we don't have to be so gentlemanly...

(The goons line up near the back of the empty parking lot, surrounding Slip. He lunges for the first Goon...who easily jumps away from him.)

Slip: Stand still so's I can deck you!

Mike: We can do that! (He and Micky clothesline the goon, knocking him over. Jessie lets another goon follow her...until he trips into a dumpster.)

*Slip goes for another goon, who swings at him first. Slip ducks, then gives the guy a well-placed uppercut.*

(Mike gets into an all-out fistfight with the fourth goon, eventually tossing him in the dumpster with his buddy.)

*The goon comes back at Slip, but Slip ducks and crawls between his legs. As soon as he's behind the goon, Slip kicks the guy in the butt. The goon goes stumbling into the nearest wall and headbutts it, knocking himself out.*

(Mike and Micky flip him into the dumpster as we hear sirens in the background and the music ends.)

Sach: The cops, the cops! *jumps out of the car*

Sergeant Nielson: (He shakes his head) What's this all about?

Mike: Just some idiots blowing off steam.

Sergeant Nielson: How did you guys get involved?

Mike: They were picking on our buddy.

Slip: *Folds his arms over his chest* I don't take kindly to idiots making short cracks.

Seargent Nielson: (As his men lead them out of the dumpster and round up the others) We'll talk to them at the station.

Peter: (Runs out as the cops start asking questions) Is everyone ok?

Mike: I think so. Are you guys ok?

Sach: I'm okay. *Slip swats his head*

Micky: Fine here.

Davy: Me too.

Jessie: (Looks herself over) I look ok. How 'bout you, surfer boy?

Nyles: Just fine, babe.

Mike: I think we need to get to the bottom of this and find out where these goons came from. (He looks over his shoulder at Frazzlemeyer's, which is just visible beyond Millie's across the street) And I know the perfect place to start.