(We open in a dark, crowded room. It appears to be a large garage. It's filled with car parts, odds-and-ends, and what looks like parts from the monitor and other items from the demolished MonkeeCave. Ursula sits on one side next to a large chemistry set and shelves filled with tools and parts.)

Shadow: (As Alex walks in through a side door, followed by shadows) Alex, we have to get to her. If we get her, we can get them all.

Alex: Yes, yes, I know.

Shadow: How's it coming?

Alex: She's being stubborn.

Shadow: That's not surprising. She's spent too much time around the other Guardians.

Alex: *snorts* No kidding.

Shadow: We'll need to awaken her to do the experiments. I guess you haven't found out just where in the car Micky put her yet.

Alex: No, I haven't. *frowns* And that really pisses me off! I should know!

Shadow: You're always saying you're Micky's "brother." Isn't there a way you can read his mind?

Alex: Don't you think I've already tried that? I don't know why, but I just can't get a read on this.

Shadow: Micky must be guarding the secret somehow, maybe even unconsciously.

Alex: Hmph.

Shadow: We'll have to figure out the secret on our own until we can get to that secret part of Micky's brain. (A hand pats the hood of the MonkeeMobile) She's rested enough. Let's get her up for some fun.

*Alex pushes a button. The MonkeeMobile slowly raises on a lift.*

Ursula: (Groggy; her headlights light up) Wha...huh? Where am I? Why am I off the ground? I don't think Micky's given me flight capabilities.

Alex: No, I put you on a lift so you don't try to get away on your own.

Ursula: Alex, what are you doing? If you've hurt Mike or the others, I'll...

Alex: Unfortunately, I didn't really have the chance.

Ursula: Stay away from them. Stay away from all of them!

Alex: Right now, we're dealing with you.

Ursula: Stay away from me, too. Who knows where your slimy hands have been?

Alex: *looks at his hands* Slimy? My hands aren't slimy...

Ursula: I wouldn't want you touching me with a million-foot pole.

Alex: Hmmm. *grabs a tool with a long handle attached to it* Well, it isn't a million foot pole, but I think it'll do.

Ursula: That looks nasty. Don't get anywhere near me with it.

Alex: *reaches with the tool into the underside of Ursula* Let’s see what we can find.

Ursula: Oooh...don't do that...ahhh....

Shadow: Those are some rather...ahem, interesting...noises she's making.

Alex: What can I say? I know my way around the women.

Ursula: That was an...oooh...awful joke.

Shadow: I'm inclined to agree with her.

*Alex pokes Ursula, making a face.* :

Ursula: Ow! Watch where you stick that thing!

Alex: Ow? That wasn't the reaction I was looking for. *pokes Ursula again*

Ursula: Ow, I...(her voice gets dreamier)...ooh, stop, please...

Alex: *grins evilly* Ah ha! I do believe I found the spot. *pokes Ursula again*

Ursula: Nooo...Alex, stop...ooOOhhh!

Shadow: (The shadow moves towards Ursula with interest) Yes? You've found it?

Alex: Oh, I found SOMETHING, alright.

Ursula: Stop...please, don't do that...

*Alex pokes Ursula again.*

Ursula: (Squeals; her tires rev) NO! Alex, please! Oooh...no!

*Alex smirks as he pokes at Ursula repeatedly.*

Ursula: Alex...don't...you'll hurt...me...I want to stay...here...

Alex: Just gotta soften you up a little bit more... *pokes Ursula a few more times*

Ursula: (Whimpers) Alex...oooh...please...

Shadow: I think she's had enough. You're enjoying this too much, Dark Savage.

Alex: *shoots the Shadow a glare* How do you know? She still said please.

(Ursula whimpers again.)

Shadow: Just get on with it.

Alex: *blinks* I thought I was.

Ursula: (She's puffing) You won't...get anything...out of...me!

Shadow: You'd be surprised what kind of information we can get, Lady Ursula.

Alex: Besides, I know your weak spot.

Ursula: (Guarded) What do you mean?

Alex: *frowns* You ARE just like every other woman. It's right here! *pokes her again, hard!*

Ursula: Ow...ahhh!

Shadow: Dark Savage, don't hurt her! Just soften her.

Alex: *plants one fist on his hip; gives the Shadow a glare* Don't you know ANYTHING about women? You try to soften them up, but they act like you're hurting them when you know sure as hell that they're enjoying it as much as you are!

Shadow: You're too rough with them. You need to treat them right. (He reaches up to pat Ursula on the hood again; she sighs)

Ursula: What a sweet...ur, shadow.

*Alex hmphs.*

Shadow: There there, Ursula. (The Shadow puts out a hand to Alex) Now see? A little kindness does wonders with a lady.

*Alex sighs, then grins suddenly. We hear the strains of a banjo in the distance. Alex looks around innocently.*

Shadow: What's that? Don't tell me the demons have been messing with the instruments again! (The Shadow disappears into the doorway, and finally all together)

Alex: *still grinning* Now, Ursula, where were we? *jabs her again with the tool*

Ursula: (Wails) Ahhh...oohhh... Shadow...said...no...

Alex: Yeah, well, the Shadow's easily distracted. *jabs her several more times*

Ursula: Ahh...Alex...oh my...

Alex: Ursula... *pokes her again* how did my brother put you into this... *pokes again* interesting car? *pokes again*

Ursula: I don't know.

Alex: What?! How can you not know? *jabs her HARD!*

Ursula: OW! Do I...look like...I have...the blueprints?

*Alex growls, disappearing in a black light. He reappears in the driver's seat.*

Alex: I am going to find out how he got you in here, even if I have to take you apart piece by piece!

Ursula: No! Get your hands OFF me! (She launches the ejector seat...which throws Alex into the reinforced celing! Alex cracks his head on the celing and lands flat on his back on the floor.)

Alex: *groans, his head lulling to one side* ...I love a feisty woman...

Shadow: (The Shadow floats in just in time to see Alex land) What did I tell you about treating the ladies roughly?

Alex: *groans* ...Shuddup...

(Alex passes out on the floor as we fade out on the garage and the Shadow.)